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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The bar chart below gives information on the percentage of british people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

The bar chart below gives information on the percentage of british people giving money to charity by age range for the years 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features.
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The provided bar chart depicts information on the
donation
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
 of British
people
Use synonyms
 between 1990 and 2010 by
age
Use synonyms
 range.
Overall
Linking Words
, in 1990 British
people
Use synonyms
 experienced a downward trend,
while
Linking Words
 the bar charts for 2010 showed an upward trend. Both the 1990 and 2010
donation
Use synonyms
 graphs have some fluctuations. In 1990, the
rate
Use synonyms
 of charity donations in the
age
Use synonyms
group
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 of 36-50
years
Use synonyms
 old was about 43 per
cent
Use synonyms
, which is the highest percentage of other groups. Next is a
group
Use synonyms
 of 51-65
years
Use synonyms
 old 35 per
cent
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 followed by a
group
Use synonyms
 of 65
years
Use synonyms
 old or above was approximately 32 per
cent
Use synonyms
, the
group
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 of 26-35
years
Use synonyms
 old was around 31 per
cent
Use synonyms
 and the
group
Use synonyms
 of teenagers was about 17 per
cent
Use synonyms
 consecutively. In 2010, the trend of
donation
Use synonyms
 to charity has changed. The bar chart shows that the highest
rate
Use synonyms
 of
donation
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 is
people
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 aged 51-65 which has increased to around 38 per
cent
Use synonyms
. For the
people
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 65
years
Use synonyms
 old or above was slightly increased to 35 per
cent
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the
group
Use synonyms
 of
age
Use synonyms
 36-50
years
Use synonyms
 old
rate
Use synonyms
 significantly decreased from 43 per
cent
Use synonyms
 in 1990 to 35 per
cent
Use synonyms
. Following by the
group
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 of
people
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 in
age
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 year 26-35 was rocketed decrease to about 24 per
cent
Use synonyms
 and the
last
Linking Words
group
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 that the
donation
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rate
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 had significantly decreased is the
group
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 of 18-25 year old was around just 6 per
cent
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words donation, rate, people, age, group, years, cent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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