Nowadays many jobs are more stressful and the working day is longer. What are the reasons for this? What can employers do to help employees?

#jobs #employers #employees

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Jobs are becoming increasingly stressful

due to

numerous reasons including

strenious

Correct your spelling

strenuous

working hours and underemployment.

For instance

, the NHS is currently experiencing a shortage of staff members,

thus

forcing healthcare professionals to work for prolonged hours. The demands of being a doctor,

such

as the constant responsibility

Change preposition

for

show examples

the

populations

Change to a genitive case

population's

populations'

show examples

well-being, paired with long working hours undoubtedly increase worry and anxiety.

Moreover

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

underemployment can be attributed to a

decrease

Wrong verb form

decreased

show examples

working population within a nation,

such

as China. In the 20th century, the government of China enforced the '

one child

Add a hyphen

one-child

show examples

policy',

consequently

leading to an increased elderly population with a small number of citizens to support them.

Hence

, the majority of institutions in China are understaffed with the employees being overworked in order to support their families. Employers to help: Include rewards for staff who work long,

this

will help reduce stress and provide for their family.

Themselves

Correct pronoun usage

They

show examples

have to work in shops.

Submitted by hayalkk02 on Fri Jul 05 2024

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coherence cohesion

Write a clear and concise introduction that outlines the main points that will be discussed in the essay.

coherence cohesion

Ensure a well-rounded conclusion that summarizes the main points and restates your opinion or the main idea.

task achievement

Expand on what employers can do to help employees by providing a variety of practical measures. This could include better work-life balance policies, mental health support, and improved working conditions.

coherence cohesion

Include transition words and phrases to enhance the flow of the essay. This will help in linking ideas and paragraphs, making the essay easier to read.

task achievement

The essay has identified relevant reasons for increasing stress levels in jobs, such as long working hours and underemployment.

task achievement

Well-chosen examples, such as the NHS and China's one-child policy, effectively support the main points made.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

153 words

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Nowadays many jobs are more stressful and the working day is longer. What are the reasons for this? What can employers do to help employees?

Fully explain your ideas

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people think that the government should provide free education at every level. However, some say that individuals should pay for their university education. Discuss both of views and give your opinion

Some people think that managers alone should make decisions in the company, while others think that employees should be involved in the decision-making process too.​ Discuss both views and give your own opinion. ​

Smart devices have put all of the world’s information at our fingertips. The benefits of this development are obvious, but what are the drawbacks?

Some people think that managers alone should make decisions in the company, while others think that employees should be involved in the decision-making process too. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. 