Last week you had travelled in a domestic airline due to some business. You did not had a good experience with that airline. The discontentment, due to the poor service, made you complain about the airline. Write an email to the Airline in about 150-200 words. Your email should do the following things: Problems faced by regular passengers Complain about the poor service

Dear Sir/
madam
Capitalize word
Madam
show examples
, My name is Faraz, and I am writing
this
email to inform you about the unsatisfactory services which were offered by your airline
last
week. I happened to travel through your airline to Vancouver
last
week for my office work, and I should say
this
, it didn't go as expected, the services offered by the staff at boarding counter were too poor as passengers were made to wait in long ques with only one counter working and were attending only one passenger at a time,
this
led to the panic situation at the
last
moment and the cabin crew were
also
taking a lot of time to respond to the queries of passengers.
Firstly
, I suggest you increase your staff at the boarding counters as one counter cannot handle
this
much workload.
Secondly
, I believe the cabin crew themselves were not at fault as they were trying their best to cater for the passengers but were overwhelmed with the requests.
Hence
you better increase the number of cabin crew as well.
Lastly
, I hope you will take
this
complaint seriously and will take corrective measures. Customer service should be given high priority to businesses like airlines. Regards, Faraz.
Submitted by hassan05.quadri on

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task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples to illustrate your points. For instance, mention a particular incident or how long exactly the wait times were.
coherence cohesion
To improve logical structure, ensure smooth transitions between sentences and paragraphs. For example, use linking words like 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', etc.
coherence cohesion
Proofread for minor grammatical errors and awkward phrases. For instance, 'long ques' should be 'long queues' and 'attending' might be better as 'servicing'.
task achievement
The email addresses all parts of the task effectively, discussing the issue and suggesting possible solutions.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, making the structure easy to follow.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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