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Writing Samples
Band 7

The table below shows the change in number of people engaged in various physical activities between the years 2001-2009 in Australia (in million people). Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the change in number of people engaged in various physical activities between the years 2001-2009 in Australia (in million people). Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#change #people #activities #years #australia #million #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The table describes information about how many people were engaged
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 5 different physical activities in Australia from 2001 to 2009. The most significant facts to emerge from the table are that the number of running participants showed an upward trend over the period
while
Linking Words
 people who
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
joined in cycling experienced a downward trend. Another interesting point is that cycling activity had the highest participator in the first period. Looking at the details, people who joined on running activity just stood at 1.4
million
Use synonyms
 next
this
Linking Words
 increased gradually from 1,7 to 2,2
million
Use synonyms
 in 2009 with the biggest percentage changes at 156%.
Whereas
Linking Words
, aerobics and tennis had similar trends which achieved growth of approximately 11% and 15%, with 1,5 and 1
million
Use synonyms
 in 2001 to 1,7 and 1,2
million
Use synonyms
 participators in 2009 respectively.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, cycling and swimming had the biggest
participants
Correct quantifier usage
number of participants
show examples
 in 2001 at 4,5 and 3,7
million
Use synonyms
.
Then
Linking Words
, from 2005 to 2009 witness that there was a
fall
Change the verb form
falling
show examples
 number in 2009 from 3,1 to 3,6
million
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 cycling and from 3,8 to 3,3
million
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 swimming.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
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