Many university students want to learn about different subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others feel it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for their qualification.

Most of the
students
prefer to learn about different
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
of
subjects
in addition
to their
mani
Correct your spelling
main
show examples
subjects
. Others feel it
it
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
more significant to give all their
time
and
attention
to studying for their qualification. On the one
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
a lot of
students
want to learn about different
subjects
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
university. Because they think all
subjects
are more important in personal life.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
anyone who wants to be a teacher just in case must know all
subjects
in school. Because each
student
may ask a question from a different
subjects
Fix the agreement mistake
subject
show examples
.
Therefore
every teacher must
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
learn every
subject
.
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
they think, knowing different
subjects
is most useful and important. Because a
student
who studies each
subject
will have a wide range of thinking
So
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
knowledge of different
subjects
does not damage in
wordlife
Correct your spelling
world
.
On the other
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
other
students
feel it is most significant to give all their
time
and
attention
to studying for their
qualificiation
Correct your spelling
qualification
qualifications
. Because they consider one
subject
is
Wrong verb form
to be
show examples
more important than
other
Change the wording
another subject
other subjects
show examples
subject
.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
medical
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
does not
ned
Correct your spelling
need
show examples
law
subjects
. He always
keep
Change the verb form
keeps
show examples
focus on only medical
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
such
as
:
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
chemistry and biology.
As well
as
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
lawyer
Replace the word
law
show examples
student
does not
nedd
Correct your spelling
need
medical
Correct article usage
a medical
show examples
subject
.
That is
why they prefer to give all their
time
and
attention
to studying for their qualification. In conclusion, many university
students
want to learn about
differnt
Correct your spelling
different
subjects
, but others
fell
Correct your spelling
feel
show examples
it is more useful to give all their
time
and
attention
to studying for their qualification each
subject
is extremely important in our life.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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task achievement
Try to avoid repetition and redundancies. For example, the phrase 'just in case' is redundant when explaining the reasoning for a teacher needing to know all subjects.
coherence cohesion
Work on the grammatical structures, such as subject-verb agreement and proper sentence formation, to ensure clarity. For example, 'must to learn' should be 'must learn.'
task achievement
Expand on your support for the main points with more detailed examples and explanations. This will make your arguments more convincing and comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
Use transitional phrases and connectors more effectively to create smoother transitions between ideas. This will help with the overall flow of the essay.
task achievement
You have presented both perspectives on the issue, which shows a balanced approach.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes your main points, which provides a sense of closure.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Broaden
  • Perspectives
  • Specialize
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Career success
  • Interdisciplinary connections
  • Structured path
  • Clear goals
  • Creativity
  • Innovation
  • Academic credibility
  • Recognition
  • Balance
  • Exploring
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