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Writing Samples /
Band 3

The bar chart shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2021. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2021. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #ten #countries #production #consumption #electricity #information #features #comparisons
The given bar
chat
Correct your spelling
chart
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provide
Change the verb form
provides
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an information
Remove the article
information
a piece of information
show examples
 about the most ten
countries
 that produce and consume
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
electricity
 in the year 2021. Units are measured
billion
Change preposition
in billion
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Kwh
Correct your spelling
kWh
Overall
, It can be seen that
chine
Correct your spelling
China
show examples
 and the United
state
Fix the agreement mistake
States
show examples
were
Wrong verb form
are
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 the
most
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
countries
 that both produce and consume
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
electricity
.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 Korea
was
Verb problem
had
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 the lowest amount of
electricity
. The
producation
Correct your spelling
production
 and consumption in
china
Capitalize word
China
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 were more than 5,000
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
kwh
. The same amount of
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
electricity
 was generated and used in Russia.
In addition
, Japan, India, and Canada generate more
electricity
 compared to consumption.
Furthermore
, about 5.000
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
show examples
Kwh
Correct your spelling
kWh
 of
electricity
 was provided in three
countries
incliding
Correct your spelling
including
france
Change the capitalization
France
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, Brazil, and
germany
Change the capitalization
Germany
show examples
. It seems that using of
electricity
 was less approximately 4000
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
Kwh
 , except in Germany .
To sum up
, the production and
using
Replace the word
use
show examples
 of
electricity
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
varies
along
Change preposition
in
show examples
 these
countries
,but highly in the United
state
Fix the agreement mistake
States
show examples
 and China.
Submitted by MM2 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words countries, electricity, kwh with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "provide" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • dual aspect
  • electricity production
  • electricity consumption
  • industrial base
  • population size
  • significant difference
  • surplus
  • deficit
  • electrical energy
  • ranking
  • economic patterns
  • industrial patterns
  • technological advancements
  • disparity
  • industrial development
  • economic capabilities
  • anomalies
  • export
  • import
  • energy efficiency
  • waste
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