Some people believe that children should spend all of their free time with their families. Others believe that this is unnecessary or even negative. Discuss the possible argument on both sides, and say which side you personally support.
Some individuals think that
kids
must spend all their free time
with their families while
others said
that it is unnecessary to do Wrong verb form
say
this
. Eventhought
many people believe that Correct your spelling
Even though
children
need to spell
all their Verb problem
spend
time
with their family, I strongly believe that this
is a negative aspect for kids
because they need to socialize with their classmates and learn fron
their abilities as well.
Many parents believe that Correct your spelling
from
children
need to stay at home
because they need to learn from their customs and acttitudes
. Correct your spelling
attitudes
Firstly
, it is vital for adults to teach their children
how to act in difficult situations, and they love to talk to them at home
. Also
, they teach them how to eat properly and stay together all the time
to create great memories. For instance
, many cultures in Latino America believe that children
need to stay at home
all the time
to avoid issues or bad behaviours. However
, I believe that children
need to get along with
kids
at their age to learn how to socialize and behave with others.
The vast majority of parents believe that it is unnecessary for children
to stay at home
all the time
,and on the contrary
, kids
need to get along with
other kids
for their well-mental being
. More importantly, Correct your spelling
well-being
kids
need to socialize with other children
to learn how this
society really works, so they might be functional adults. Also
, Kids
need to learn from other children
how to develop new skills such
as playing soccer, swimming or dancing. For instance
, kids
in The United States usually spend all their time
at school with other classmates and they teach others how to develop new skills like swimming compentencies
and playing basketball. I believe Correct your spelling
competencies
this
is a preferable way of thinking because kids
need to get along with
other kids
and learn new ways of thinking.
To conclude
, although
some parents believe they need to keep their children
with them all the time
to teach them, I strongly belive
it is more convenient to let them grow and learn from classmates, and Correct your spelling
believe
this
might give them new ways of live
.Replace the word
life
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coherence cohesion
Work on transitioning smoothly between ideas and paragraphs to enhance coherence.
task achievement
Minimize grammatical and spelling errors for better clarity and professionalism.
task achievement
Present balanced views with stronger support and examples on both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear structure including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
Main ideas and arguments are clearly stated and supported with examples.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?