Robots can free people from difficult and dangerous work. However, some people are worried about the possible dangers robots may create. Discuss the benefits of using robots and the possible dangers from it.
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Employment in the modern world has been upgraded to robotic technologies. Comparing to the olden days humans are replaced by
robots
in most of the developing sectors. The benefits and the dangers are
caused by the Unnecessary verb
apply
robots
will be discussed in the following paragraphs.
Firstly
, we all know that in the late '20s, the development of AI tools made the toughest job even easier. Now robots
are built with more advanced AI tools in which one can build its
own car with simple instructions. That has reduced a huge man power which made the company more profitable. Correct pronoun usage
their
his
her
Also
Add a comma
Also,
robots
are being developed to fight in an army against another country in a war. Assume there are two competitors S and A are manufacturing mobile phones, S is making the mobiles with advanced robots
which has zero issue in that and A is making the mobile phones with humans with a proper design and it takes too long to finish the product comparing to company S. So, in this
situation, most people will go for company S.
Once Elon Musk said, "AI is far more dangerous than what we think". Eventhough
he is the CEO of an automated car he is telling Correct your spelling
Even though
this
because when he was in the invention process they faced more dangerous things working with robots
. on the other hand
, if we compete humans
and a robot in a cooking competition, the robot will finish first but the human will make that dish tastier and present it in a better way. in Change preposition
with humans
this
regard
the robot cannot replace a chef.
In conclusion, some people think Add a comma
regard,
robots
can make mistakes but my opinion is robots
are Robots
can free people from difficult and dangerous work.
Therefore
the benefit of using robots
is easier and safer in some fields. Submitted by insighttribez on
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coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, focus on linking ideas smoothly. Use transition words and phrases such as 'moreover,' 'for instance,' and 'therefore' to connect your points better.
task achievement
Ensure that all main points are fully supported and explained. Provide more specific examples and elaborate on them to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
The essay should have a more structured and detailed conclusion that summarizes the key points and gives a final opinion or recommendation.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, giving the essay a clear beginning and end.
task achievement
The essay includes relevant examples, such as companies S and A and Elon Musk's quote, making the arguments more relatable.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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