IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The map below is of the town of Canterbury. A new school (S) is planned for the area. The map shows two possible sites for the school.

The map below is of the town of Canterbury. A new school (S) is planned for the area. The map shows two possible sites for the school.
#town #canterbury #school #area #two #sites
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, governments are more aware of the benefits of schools.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they are implementing new schools to make a wide range of citizens utilise it. The presented map demonstrates the two possible sides to constructing a new school in Canterbury.
Site
Use synonyms
 1, The most beneficial thing about
this
Linking Words
 side is that it will serve the students who live in the countryside region.
This
Linking Words
 area has a low infrastructure with low road quality. It
also
Linking Words
 will assist about 7000 citizens in Sturry city.
However
Linking Words
, the citizens in Chartham city will suffer to arrive at the
site
Use synonyms
 .
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Site
Use synonyms
 2 is in the town centre,
thus
Linking Words
 the students can enjoy other facilities in
this
Linking Words
 region.
Moreover
Linking Words
, There is not any traffic zone ,
hence
Linking Words
 they will be able to walk for free and safely.
This
Linking Words
site
Use synonyms
 is
also
Linking Words
 in the middle between both Chartham and Sturry city, so it will help about 11500 people.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Site
Use synonyms
 2 pros overshadow the pros of
Site
Use synonyms
 1. The priority of constructing a new school is to serve the most amount of individuals.
Submitted by mohannadsme on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words site with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • compare
  • contrast
  • location
  • accessibility
  • residential areas
  • facilities
  • traffic
  • transportation
  • environment
  • cost
  • feasibility
What to do next:
Look at other essays: