Some people think that employers should not care about the way their employees dress because what matters is the quality of their work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There are different views on the issue of companies should not take care of the form of clothes which employees wear.Some people suggest that it is their right to wear whatever they like and prohibiting that would be a violation of their civil liberties ,
thus
, My personal attitude toward
this
is that prohibiting wearing personal clothes in offices would adversely affect
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
workers' mental health and the quality of work in the most gravest
porpuse
Correct your spelling
purpose
.There are two principal responses to
this
.
Submitted by takhtejamshid1400historikal on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, focus on organizing your essay better. Begin with a clear introduction, stating your main argument. Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next and that your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points.
task achievement
Introduce clear and comprehensive ideas by expanding on your main points. Provide detailed explanations and examples to support your arguments. Avoid making general statements without backing them up.
task achievement
You have a clear stance on the issue, which is good, as it shows you have a defined position.
coherence cohesion
Your approach to supporting your argument by mentioning civil liberties and mental health is thoughtful and relevant.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • dress code
  • professional attire
  • workplace culture
  • productivity
  • branding
  • perception
  • creativity
  • equality
  • bias
  • discrimination
  • first impressions
  • freedom of expression
  • quality of work
  • skill set
  • professionalism
  • comfort
  • clientele
  • stakeholders
  • competence
  • formal attire
What to do next:
Look at other essays: