New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

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The children’s leisure time has changed with the advancement of technology.

This

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offers numerous benefits, the most noticeable of which is an improved learning process.

However

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, the drawbacks,

such

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as lack of supervision, must not be neglected.

To begin

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with, one of the core advantages of modern

technologies

Use synonyms

is their improved process of learning. Everyone can access the internet to use many sources , which is used by popular universities and it is suitable for different types of learners.

Additionally

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this

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format of learning is highly flexible, as it allows great convenience. For these reasons,

technologies

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have improved the way of learning new things. A prime example is Khan Academy . Because of

this

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a lot of learners can learn hard skills .

On the other hand

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, the main drawback of

this

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is that if parents do not supervise, it might have serious repercussions for their children.

This

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can lead to them surfing social media or consuming unfiltered information, which can affect their physiology.

Moreover

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, it is easy to waste time on entertainment or video games, which

and

Correct word choice

apply

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Correct pronoun usage

apply

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cause

Correct subject-verb agreement

causes

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Change preposition

apply

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addiction to them.

Therefore

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, despite their benefits,

technologies

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might have negative consequences.

For instance

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Tik Tok

Correct your spelling

TikTok

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and CS (counter strike) are stealing their

child

Change noun form

child's

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valuable time . In conclusion , recent improvements in

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technologies

Fix the agreement mistake

technology

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allow kids

explore

Fix the infinitive

to explore

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more possibilities , revealing both advantages and disadvantages . The main selling point of

Use synonyms

technologies

Fix the agreement mistake

technology

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is the

enhance

Wrong verb form

enhanced

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education,

while

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its weakness lies in the lack of control over the children by their parents .

mamashukuruvbobur31Fri Jul 12 2024

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task achievement

To improve the task response, you could add more detailed examples and points to support your ideas.

coherence cohesion

Focus on refining transitions between sentences and paragraphs to strengthen coherence and cohesion.

task achievement

The essay successfully presents both advantages and disadvantages of the topic, providing a balanced view.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively frame the discussion.

coherence cohesion

Main points are supported with relevant examples, making the argument strong and convincing.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

253 words

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New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Your opinion

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agre or disagree?

In recent years, there has been a rise in the use of performance enhancing drugs in sports. What are the consequences of doping for athletes? What measures should be taken to combat this issue?

Creative artists should be given freedom to express their ideas through words, pictures, music or films. Some people nevertheless think that the government should restrict artist’ freedom of expression. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Last week, you visited a local supermarket and you got saticfactory service. Write a letter to the supermarket manager to thank. In your letter: - introduce yourself; - say why you are satisfied; - say thank you and write about your future visits.

Write a letter to the publisher in a newspaper, asking to advertise a meeting of people from different countries you are organizing. Explain where, when and why