Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest times of most people’s lives. Others think that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of greater responsibilities.

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A number of members of the public have the opinion that the
time
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when you are young
the
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is the
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most enjoyable period of life. Another view
that
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is that
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older people are happier
although
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they have more work to do. I will examine both
opinion
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opinions
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and give my own point of view. In terms of being young, there are a good of advantages. For the first have
less
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fewer
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things to do
for example
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primary students every weekday they just go to school
study
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to study
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and on the weekend they have
a
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apply
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free
time
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.
Secondly
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more
time
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like on the weekend they can do anything
what
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apply
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they want to do
such
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as
playing
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play
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or go
hangout
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hang out
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with their friends.
Finally
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, more energy as we can see in
normal
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the normal
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case when I was
kid
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a kid
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I can exercise and do something else without taking rest but when I get older if I am finishing exercise I need to take rest for two to three hours so I can have
energy
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the energy
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to do something again. With
the
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apply
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reference to the benefits of being older, there are many strengths. In the first place have more money Most Adults usually have a job and
therefore
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earn a salary every month and use
for
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it for
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their own necessary. Another one is more freedom
in
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at
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school
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the school
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level have to learn
everyday
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every day
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but in
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collage,
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collage
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college
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there will be more free
time
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and go
where ever
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wherever
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they want.
Lastly
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,
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Adult age
have
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has
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more experience than young age
cause
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because
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they live in
this
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world more than kids. In summary, I strongly agree that early life is more satisfactory than the later years, especially because
juvenlie
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juvenile
juveniles
do not need to work or take much responsibility and they can have fun with their childhood. For
me
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me,
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this
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moment can happen only
one
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once
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in
the
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a
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life
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lifetime
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time
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and it was the best period of my span.
Submitted by nugentsr on

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coherence cohesion
Work on writing clearer and more precise topic sentences for each paragraph to improve logical flow.
task achievement
Try to provide a more balanced discussion by including some counterarguments.
language grammar
Proofread your work to avoid grammatical errors and awkward phrasing.
complete response
The essay addresses both sides of the debate, fulfilling the task requirement.
task achievement
You provided some relevant examples to support your points, helping to clarify your arguments.
coherence cohesion
A clear introduction and conclusion are present, giving the essay structure.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Formative years
  • Autonomy
  • Fulfillment
  • Wisdom
  • Significant choices
  • Exploration
  • Financial responsibilities
  • Deeper relationships
  • Personal growth
  • Accomplishments
  • Character development
  • Life milestones
  • Adulthood
  • Adolescence
  • Carefree nature
  • Achievements
  • Life satisfaction
  • Stress-free
  • Independence
  • Responsibilities
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