IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people think that cooking is an important skill for young people to learn. Others believe that it is better for people to learn how to cook after they become adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Introduction
Cooking skill for young
people
Use synonyms
 is important basic for
chidren
Correct your spelling
children
 to learn. Meanwhile, some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that it is better for adults.
This
Linking Words
 essay will
disscuss
Correct your spelling
discuss
 both views and I will show my opinion.
Body paragraph 1
At
first,
Linking Words
children always need activities for spending time with family, and learning cooking is the best class that many parents
chosen
Wrong verb form
choose
show examples
 for their child.
However
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, young
people
Use synonyms
 are not requesting
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
high
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
that
Correct word choice
but
show examples
 just for fun and
relax time
Wrong verb form
relaxation
show examples
. In the UK,
every
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
children
Change to a singular noun
child
show examples
 between 5 to 10 years old around 85% are taken
cooking
Add an article
a cooking
the cooking
show examples
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
show examples
for learning
Change preposition
to learn
show examples
 how to cook
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their free time and one
of
Correct your spelling
or
show examples
 two of those
people
Use synonyms
bacome
Correct your spelling
become
come
 to be the future chef.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Professional chefs
perfer
Correct your spelling
prefer
 adults to be their students
due to
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 there are
intented
Correct your spelling
intended
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
class and
followed
Wrong verb form
following
show examples
 what
teacher
Correct article usage
the teacher
show examples
 odering home work.
Cooking
Correct article usage
A cooking
show examples
 job is not
labour
Correct article usage
a labour
show examples
 job that
no
Verb problem
does not
show examples
 need skills, how to be
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 good chef
perfer
Correct your spelling
requires
Correct article usage
a certificated
show examples
certificated
Replace the word
certificate
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 skill not only because
checking
Change preposition
of checking
show examples
levels
Correct article usage
the levels
show examples
 of
person
Correct article usage
the person
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
 because
thusting
Correct your spelling
of
 what
person
Correct article usage
a person
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 done before.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, in the USA every
chefs
Change to a singular noun
chef
show examples
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
 to
decare
Correct your spelling
declare
show examples
 their
certificated
Replace the word
certificate
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
taking
Verb problem
get
show examples
 the permit
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 work.
Conclusion
To
recapitulated
Change the form of the verb
recapitulate
show examples
, there are many reasons why children should learn
cooking
Change preposition
to cooking
show examples

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coherence couples suggestion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and is well-supported with specific examples and explanations. This will help your essay to be more coherent and cohesive.
use comp lex suggestion
Work on using a wider range of vocabulary and more complex sentence structures to improve the clarity and sophistication of your ideas.
proofread suggestion
Double-check your spelling and grammar to minimize errors and enhance readability.
structure suggestion
Make sure your introduction clearly outlines both views and includes your opinion succinctly. Also, ensure you have a strong concluding paragraph that reinforces your viewpoint.
examples highlight
You have included relevant statistics and examples, which help to support your points.
task response highlight
Your essay addresses the topic and includes both perspectives as required.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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