The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Nowadays, scientific developments are occurring at a great rate but some of them seem not to be helpful for
population's
Correct article usage
the population's
lives
. Use synonyms
Additionally
, sometimes scientific innovations are harmful and regretted by those who invented them. Linking Words
This
essay will argue that science should never harm Linking Words
public
but Correct article usage
the public
scientists
should aim to Use synonyms
further
understanding as much as to improve Linking Words
nation's
Correct article usage
the nation's
lives
.
On one hand, there is strong evidence that public good should be the top priority for Use synonyms
scientists
. They are the ones who have the potential to make discoveries and invent things that can change the world to be a better place. Electricity, modern medicine, telecommunications and the internet are just some of the scientific innovations that changed Use synonyms
lives
for the better.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, sometimes Linking Words
scientists
do research just for their knowledge, Use synonyms
while
they should make absolutely sure that their experiments do no harm. They may not know how their project will be used to improve society's Linking Words
lives
or harmful until they finish their findings. Use synonyms
For example
, the scientist Nobel invented dynamite to help with mining, not knowing that it would be used in weapons, Nuclear energy that first Linking Words
aim
to be a clean Wrong verb form
aimed
energies
but later Fix the agreement mistake
energy
it
used for war, and the Correct pronoun usage
apply
scientists
who discovered the life-saving drug penicillin did so by chance.
In conclusion, science should improve people's Use synonyms
lives
better and ought to be one of the highest aims. Use synonyms
However
, knowledge and discoveries are aims in themself and are just important for the scientist. Many times Linking Words
scientists
never know that breakthrough innovations will be used until their work is done.Use synonyms
Submitted by sippakorn.wet on
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Task Response
The essay addresses the task effectively, but there are some clarifications needed to strengthen your arguments. For example, while you correctly point out that some scientific developments have negative impacts, connecting these points clearly to whether the aim of science should solely be to improve lives would enhance your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea. While your first body paragraph discusses the potential for science to improve lives, and your second body paragraph highlights unintended negative consequences, it would be helpful to more clearly link these points back to your main argument. Transition smoothly between ideas to maintain coherence.
Task Response
You have provided relevant and specific examples, such as Nobel's invention of dynamite and the discovery of penicillin, which effectively illustrate your points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion that appropriately frame your arguments. The conclusion restates the primary goal effectively.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.