The chart below shows the annual number of rentals and sales( in various formats) of film from a particular store between 2002 and 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the annual number of rentals and sales( in various formats) of film from a particular store between 2002 and 2011.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar chart illustrates the annual number of rentals and
sales
of
film
Fix the agreement mistake
films
show examples
between 2002 and 2011.
And there
Correct word choice
There
show examples
are 4 kinds of rental and
sales
format
Fix the agreement mistake
formats
show examples
: rentals, VHS
sales
, DVD
sales
, and Blu-ray
sales
.
Overall
, in 2002, rental service was the most popular, but 9 years
after
Rephrase
later
show examples
, Blu-ray
film
accounted big portion of
sales
. The use of rental
service
Fix the agreement mistake
services
show examples
and VHS rapidly decreased. Surprisingly, from 2006, no one
use
Wrong verb form
used
show examples
VHS
film
.
However
,
from
Change preposition
in
show examples
2007, Blu-ray
was came
Change the verb form
came
show examples
out and people use it steadily. And the number of
peakness
Correct your spelling
peaks
peakedness
of DVD
sales
was over 200,000, which means DVD
film
was the most popular one among
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them, even though the
sales
slightly
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
after 2007.
Submitted by starmino0113 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, film with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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