More and more qualified people are moving from poor to rich countries to fill vacancies in specialist areas like engineering, computing and medicine. Some people believe that by encouraging the movement of such people, rich countries are stealing from poor countries. Others feel that this is only part of the natural movement of workers around the world.
It is well-known that currently the poor population with less resources but
also
with enough knowledge, such
as engineering, computing and medicine, prefers to live in another place with better life quality. I agree with the idea to improve
your way Change preposition
of improving
to
Change preposition
of
live
and Replace the word
life
have
new experiences moving from your native Wrong verb form
having
country
.
On the one hand, some people believe that this
movement means that poor countries are being stolen. That might be because if the most qualified persons
are leaving their place, their Replace the word
people
country
will get poorer. The solution might be from
the Government Change preposition
for
by helping
them, Change preposition
to help
for instance
, by increasing their salary or with a new law with which the emigrants should pay some tax to their country
.
On the other hand
, others claim the emigration movement as
a natural movement for all workers Correct your spelling
was
over
the world, because the world is so huge, and Rephrase
all over
plein
with opportunities. Correct your spelling
filled
Therefore
, we do not have the obligation to stay in the same place, moreover
the change is a healthy way to learn more and feel more satisfied. Add a comma
moreover,
For example
, jobs such
as engineer and doctor, are more well-paid in certain cities. Consequently
, they take part of these advantages, and everyone should support it.
In conclusion, taking advantages
and opportunities is part of our lives, and we should be aware of living how we wish, Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
instead
of thinking about the richness of our country
, because this
is part of its Government. As a result
, I agree with the emigration idea like
a natural change.Change preposition
as
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task achievement
To enhance task response, ensure that you address both sides of the argument equally and provide a more balanced discussion. Additionally, offering more specific details and examples can strengthen your points.
coherence cohesion
While the essay flows fairly well, some improvements in logical structure could enhance coherence and cohesion. Breaking down the arguments into more distinct paragraphs may clarify the points being made, and using clear transitional phrases can assist in connecting ideas more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and provide a good overview of the essay's main arguments and final stance.
task achievement
The essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic, and the ideas presented are relevant to the discussion on migration and its impacts.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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