Some people believe that teenager should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time . This can be benefit teenagers and the community as well . To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is a discussion among
people
about forcing
teenager
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers
show examples
to do voluntary
work
in the community in their free time. Proponents say
this
will be a good influence on the community. In
this
essay, I will discuss
this
view and give my opinion.
Firstly
, community
work
experience can be valuable for future college applications and job resumes. By doing
work
and coming into contact with various
people
,
teenagers
get valuable social skills,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
exposes
Correct subject-verb agreement
expose
show examples
them to real-world issues and challenges, enhancing their problem-solving skills.
This
shows employers these young adults are motivated and not only driven by monetary motives
Secondly
, It provides a constructive way for
teenagers
do
Correct your spelling
to
show examples
use their free time in a productive way, reducing the risk of engaging in detrimental activities like smoking or drinking.
This
is a vital tool in protecting children from
bad
Correct article usage
the bad
show examples
influences they might face.
Thirdly
, by coming into contact with unfamiliar situations,
teenagers
develop a sense of responsibility and empathy, when,
for example
, they are confronted with
people
living in precarious living situations, which they normally will not encounter in their daily lives
To conclude
, I
recon
Correct your spelling
reckon
show examples
there are no possible downsides to
teenagers
doing voluntary
work
,
on the contrary
, I think it offers only positive benefits to young
people
by doing something productive in their
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
show examples
and aiding them in their future careers.
Submitted by laurens.belgium on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Further clarify the connection between ideas in consecutive sentences by using conjunctions or transitional phrases.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, consider discussing potential counterarguments, even if just to refute them. This can demonstrate a more balanced and comprehensive viewpoint.
task achievement
Make sure to catch small grammatical errors ('detrimental activities like smoking or drinking' should be 'detrimental activities such as smoking or drinking') to enhance the clarity and professionalism of your essay.
task achievement
The essay presents clear and comprehensive ideas that are well-developed. Each main point is supported with a relevant example or explanation.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps structure the essay effectively.
supporting points
Main points are supported with relevant and specific examples, making the argument more convincing.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • mandatory
  • community service
  • empathy
  • real-world issues
  • problem-solving skills
  • social skills
  • networks
  • constructive
  • detrimental activities
  • college applications
  • job resumes
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