IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

The two below show the site of a college in 2006 and the present day.

#two #show #site #college
The maps illustrate the developments in Lynwich
College
 from 2006 to the present day.
Overall
,
it is clear that
while
 some parts remained unchanged including the second
college
 building, sports field, cafeteria, bus stop and bike storage were added to the
map
. In the year 2006, there was a path in the centre of the
college
, which connected the
college
 buildings and the
library
. In the south, there was a garden.
Also
 to the North of the
map
, there was a more road. In the past of Car Park, there was a
library
.
Moreover
, in the north of the
map
, there were sports fields. Turning to the present day
map
, in the centre of the
college
 the cafeteria was built.
Also
, the
library
 has been replaced by a sports centre and the
library
 has been moved to the Southwest of the area.
Moreover
, bike storage was constructed near the car park.
Finally
, a new bus stop took place near the road which on the North of the
College
.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
Improve the introduction and conclusion by providing a fuller overview and final thoughts.
clear comprehensive ideas
Enhance the explanations of changes more clearly and comprehensively to improve clarity.
relevant specific examples
Include more specific examples to support your descriptions and analyses of the developments.
logical structure
The essay provides a logical structure, clearly comparing the two maps.
complete response
The response successfully covers all the main points and changes in the maps.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: