Children are now less active in their free time than in the past. Therefore, sports lessons must be compulsory in schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Children are the buds of every nation because they are the next generation
mankind
. These days, Kids do not prefer to Change preposition
of mankind
Physical
activity in their spare time Add a missing verb
do Physical
than
in the past period, Correct word choice
as
hence
, sports
syllabus
ought
be Add the word
ought to
mantadory
in Correct your spelling
mandatory
schools
. I strongly agree with this
Statement for the following reasons.
To commence with, educational institutions must be added syllabus
because Fix the agreement mistake
syllabi
infant's
physical activity has been Correct article usage
an infant's
dimishing
over and over, but Correct your spelling
diminishing
schools
have mantory
lessons, Correct your spelling
mandatory
they
should participate. Correct word choice
so they
This
is, when Sports
become a compulsory Subject
in Fix capitalization
subject
schools
, while
toddlers will not refuse to play sports
, and as a result
, it reduces obesity Problems. For example
, take Western nations, a large number of children are affected by weight gaining
Change the form of the verb
gain
due to
a lack of physical activity. To be more precise, infants could be active when sports
become a mandatory lesson in their academies in order to they
Stay far away from obesity issues.
Correct pronoun usage
apply
Furthermore
, this
compulsory syllabus
leads to acheive Sports
competitions. That is
, at their
early age they start to practice Change the word
an
of
Change preposition
apply
Sports
, so they have more interest to practice
Change preposition
in practicing
along with
Play
, which Fix the agreement mistake
playing
it
stimulates to Correct pronoun usage
apply
next
level Correct article usage
the next
to
them. Change preposition
apply
For instance
, many sports
players have spoken at their success party, they had a
motivation from their Remove the article
apply
Schools
, and their PET teacher always brought them in
Change preposition
into
field
forcefully; that's why they Correct article usage
the field
are Succeed
. Needless to say, educational institutions should Wrong verb form
succeeded
be add
Change the verb form
add
sports
as compulsory lessons, no one takes
leaves, and absent Correct subject-verb agreement
take
in
particular days, Change preposition
on
this
brings more active
, so Replace the word
activity
Add an article
the child
a child
child
can Fix the agreement mistake
children
performance
better way in academics.
In conclusion, Replace the word
perform
schools
should introduce sports
lesson
as compulsory Fix the agreement mistake
lessons
Subject
in order Fix the agreement mistake
Subjects
to
Change preposition
for
child's
inactiveness would be lessened significantly because it helps to reduce the obesity issues among toddlers Fix the agreement mistake
children's
as well as
it stimulates kids to perform sports
at their
early age in order to they will be Change the word
an
a
famous Correct article usage
apply
sports
player in one day. Therefore
, I completely agree with
that Change preposition
apply
syllabus
must be added in Fix the agreement mistake
syllabi
schools
.Submitted by reanudeepan on
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coherence
You have provided a clear introduction and conclusion which helps in understanding your stance. However, ensure that each paragraph focuses on one main idea and develop it fully to avoid a superficial treatment of your points.
cohesion
Some sentences are difficult to understand due to grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Try to simplify your language and focus on clear, concise expression.
task
You included some relevant examples, but they need to be more specific and well-explained to clearly illustrate your points. Additionally, ensure your ideas are clearly articulated and logically connected.
language
Pay attention to grammar and vocabulary usage to make your essay more readable. Errors are present, and addressing these can improve the clarity of your arguments.
coherence
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and effectively bracket the essay.
task
You have a clear stance on the topic, advocating for compulsory sports lessons in schools.