In some cities public parks and open space are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruits and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays, The world much more need to be germinated because our natural
resource
will be Fix the agreement mistake
resources
jeoparsized
Correct your spelling
jeopardised
therefore
I strongly support this
change and this
essay will examine advantages
of Correct article usage
the advantages
vegatitions
.
Supporting natural habitats is Correct your spelling
vegetation
vegetations
Correct article usage
an essantial
essantial
issue because recent Correct your spelling
essential
time
the world's Fix the agreement mistake
times
urbanizations
Fix the agreement mistake
urbanization
are
constantly Verb problem
has
soaring
. Wrong verb form
soared
Therefore
people
can not find a green area morover
they struggling with public Correct your spelling
moreover
Parks
. For
example
Add a comma
example,
the
public Correct article usage
apply
parks
contain open - gym equipment wherefore people
need to see more
green realm.
The government should change it Add an article
the more
such
as they can build natural gardens
which are fulled
Replace the word
full
with
fruits and Change preposition
of
vegetable
.
Fix the agreement mistake
vegetables
On the other
hand
many Add a comma
hand,
people
believe that,
Remove the comma
apply
states
Fix the agreement mistake
state
Parks
just provide playgrounds area for children, as opposed that
Change preposition
to
gardens
allow
many activities . Wrong verb form
allowing
For example
many times people
feel quite exhausted morover
they must go out where green Correct your spelling
moreover
Parks
. In my opinion , local residents should more spend time in the fruits
Change the noun form
fruit
gardens
İf they have. İt is unmistakably that gardens
have numerous advantage
overweight rather than Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
Correct your spelling
disadvantage
disadavantage
In conclusion , we need lots of green swathes area Correct your spelling
disadvantages
furthermore
central Parks
have more drawbacks than beneficial features.Submitted by kickbox191 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear and concise structure. Start with an introduction that presents the issue and your position. Each main point should be a separate paragraph, and you should conclude by summarizing your argument.
coherence cohesion
Improve the coherence of your essay by using linking words and phrases. There are instances where ideas feel disjointed or disconnected. Words like 'however', 'therefore', and 'for instance' can help make your essay flow better.
coherence cohesion
Spend some time expanding on and supporting your main points with specific examples and explanations. For example, when you talk about the benefits of green spaces, explain how they benefit physical and mental health.
task response
Make sure to provide a complete response to the prompt. While you addressed the advantages of turning parks into gardens, you need to discuss the disadvantages more thoroughly to provide a balanced view.
task response
Work on developing clear and comprehensive ideas. Each paragraph should clearly relate to the main topic and support your overall argument.
task response
Use specific examples to substantiate your points. This could be studies, real-world examples, or hypothetical scenarios that vividly illustrate your argument.
task response
Your essay presents a clear standpoint that supports transforming public parks into gardens for local residents. This shows that you have understood the prompt and have taken a position on the issue.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly outlines the essay’s purpose, and the conclusion attempts to summarize the main points, which shows that you have a grasp of essay structure.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.