It's clear that people don't have enough information about what exactly can be
beneficial
Add an article
a beneficial
show examples
way to protect
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
a case in
apoint
Correct your spelling
point
is these issues not raises in schools another reason is they firmly believe in government is
also
Linking Words
responsible
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
a certain extent.
Body paragraph 2
The government should educate people about these problems and encourage us to change our habits,they need to show everyone that we are putting the very future of our planet at risk.
Conclusion
We can
also
Linking Words
help protect our environment by not using
Add a hyphen
phosphate-based
show examples
phosphate based
Add a hyphen
phosphate-based
show examples
detergents,
this
Linking Words
will help to keep pollutants out of our
foodchain
Correct your spelling
food chain
show examples
ghorbanisahar355
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
The essay should have a clearer introduction and conclusion. An introduction should provide an overview of the topic and outline the main points that will be discussed. The conclusion should summarize the key points and provide a final thought or call to action.
task achievement
Try to develop the main points more thoroughly by providing specific examples and elaborating on them. For instance, explain how exactly people can protect the environment in their daily lives.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to improve the flow and connection between sentences and paragraphs. This will help the reader follow the argument more easily. Examples include 'Firstly, Secondly, Consequently, As a result, Moreover, In addition, etc.'
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt and attempts to provide reasons for why people don't make efforts to protect the environment and suggests some solutions.
task achievement
The writer has identified the role of the government and education in encouraging environmental protection, which is a strong point in the discussion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
In today's society, it is common for young people to take a gap year to work or travel before starting university. This essay will discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of this practice.
I am writing this letter to bring your attention to the product which I have ordered from your online store. I delivered the new modern computer, but the amount I received was a laptop. When I got the box that your company sent, I thought it would be PC as the box was large enough to put this device inside of it. But I opened the pack only after I received the brand.
I am writing in response to your advert on Indeed regarding some open volunteering opportunities at Schlegel Villages.I am driven by the exceptional services offered by your company and your unwavering commitment towards senior's care. I am particularly interested in applying for recreation assistant position so that I can excel in providing holistic care to clients.
In recent times, there has been a growing belief that children today do not respect their parents as much as they did in the past. Some argue that this shift in attitude is having a detrimental impact on society. While this view may have merit in certain situations, the underlying reasons for this perceived decline in respect are complex and require careful examination.