Write a letter to a bookstore manager who is living in another city. Ask him/ her to make available a book that you are interested in. In you letter. - What book you are looking for? - Why you need this book. - How you plan to purchase the book.

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing
this
email regarding an important
book
that I need for my study plan
in
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at
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university. I have been looking for
this
book
since
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for
show examples
2
week
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weeks
show examples
and
still
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am still
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unable to find it in my city.
Therefore
, I kindly
requests
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request
show examples
from
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that
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you
offering
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offer
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this
book
in your store. The
book
is called 'Creative Writing'
wrote
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written
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by John Smith, who is an
american
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American
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writer, and famous for his academic writing. It's the second edition for
intermidate
Correct your spelling
intermediate
level students.
In addition
to that, the
book
is highly
recommnded
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recommended
by most of my teachers in
collage
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college
show examples
and got a high rate
in
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on
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the Internet.
This
is why it's out of stock from all the
book stores
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bookstores
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in my area. I need
this
book
because it's required for me in order to pass the final writing exam. The test is set
in
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at
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the end of the year, and I have to learn how to write an essay before I
finished
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finish
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the
foundaition
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foundation
year.
Also
, my writing skills are very weak and need to
get
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be
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developed.
Therefore
, I need the
book
as soon as possible.
Furthermore
, I would be very
greatful
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grateful
if your store
providing
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provided
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a Visa payment, because I believe that online payment is the most comfortable method for me
insted
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instead
of
the
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apply
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cash. I am looking forward to
hear
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hearing
show examples
from you. If you need any
further
information please contact me by email. Kind regards, NOUF MUT.
Submitted by noufxmut on

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task achievement
There are some grammatical errors and spelling mistakes (e.g., 'requests' should be 'request', 'wrote' should be 'written', 'intermidate' should be 'intermediate').
task achievement
You could elaborate a bit more on how you plan specifically to use the book to improve your writing skills
coherence cohesion
Adding transition words (e.g., 'Moreover', 'Additionally') could improve the logical flow between paragraphs.
task achievement
You clearly state the book you need and provide reasons for why it's important. This fulfills the task requirements well.
task achievement
The letter maintains a polite and formal tone, suitable for a letter to a bookstore manager.
coherence cohesion
The paragraphs are well-structured, each focusing on a specific aspect of the task.
coherence cohesion
You have used proper openings and closings, which adds formality and structure to your letter.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • edition
  • publication year
  • out of stock
  • academic purposes
  • personal interest
  • work-related reasons
  • unavailable
  • shipping costs
  • reserve
  • in-person pick-up
  • online payment
What to do next:
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