Write a letter to a bookstore manager who is living in another city. Ask him/ her to make available a book that you are interested in. In you letter. - What book you are looking for? - Why you need this book. - How you plan to purchase the book.

#bookstore #manager #city #book #plan #purchase

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing

this

email regarding an important

book

that I need for my study plan

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university. I have been looking for

this

book

since

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for

show examples

week

Change to a plural noun

weeks

show examples

and

still

Add a missing verb

am still

show examples

unable to find it in my city.

Therefore

, I kindly

requests

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request

show examples

from

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that

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you

offering

Wrong verb form

offer

show examples

this

book

in your store. The

book

is called 'Creative Writing'

wrote

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written

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by John Smith, who is an

american

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American

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writer, and famous for his academic writing. It's the second edition for

intermidate

Correct your spelling

intermediate

level students.

In addition

to that, the

book

is highly

recommnded

Correct your spelling

recommended

by most of my teachers in

collage

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college

show examples

and got a high rate

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the Internet.

This

is why it's out of stock from all the

book stores

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bookstores

show examples

in my area. I need

this

book

because it's required for me in order to pass the final writing exam. The test is set

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the end of the year, and I have to learn how to write an essay before I

finished

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finish

show examples

the

foundaition

Correct your spelling

foundation

year.

Also

, my writing skills are very weak and need to

get

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developed.

Therefore

, I need the

book

as soon as possible.

Furthermore

, I would be very

greatful

Correct your spelling

grateful

if your store

providing

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provided

show examples

a Visa payment, because I believe that online payment is the most comfortable method for me

insted

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instead

the

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apply

show examples

cash. I am looking forward to

hear

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hearing

show examples

from you. If you need any

further

information please contact me by email. Kind regards, NOUF MUT.

Submitted by noufxmut on Thu Jul 18 2024

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task achievement

There are some grammatical errors and spelling mistakes (e.g., 'requests' should be 'request', 'wrote' should be 'written', 'intermidate' should be 'intermediate').

task achievement

You could elaborate a bit more on how you plan specifically to use the book to improve your writing skills

coherence cohesion

Adding transition words (e.g., 'Moreover', 'Additionally') could improve the logical flow between paragraphs.

task achievement

You clearly state the book you need and provide reasons for why it's important. This fulfills the task requirements well.

task achievement

The letter maintains a polite and formal tone, suitable for a letter to a bookstore manager.

coherence cohesion

The paragraphs are well-structured, each focusing on a specific aspect of the task.

coherence cohesion

You have used proper openings and closings, which adds formality and structure to your letter.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

238 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

edition
publication year
out of stock
academic purposes
personal interest
work-related reasons
unavailable
shipping costs
reserve
in-person pick-up
online payment

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Write a letter to a bookstore manager who is living in another city. Ask him/ her to make available a book that you are interested in. In you letter. - What book you are looking for? - Why you need this book. - How you plan to purchase the book.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driveless vehicles outweight the disadvantages?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.