IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this is the case? What can governments do to help the amount of rubbish produced?

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It is true that increased
consumerism
Use synonyms
 has led to higher
waste
Use synonyms
 production as people buy and discard items more frequently. There are a variety of reasons for
this
Linking Words
, but steps can definitely be taken
tackle
Fix the infinitive
to tackle
show examples
 the problem.
To begin
Linking Words
 with that, modern lifestyle is one of the major reasons to produce many
waste
Use synonyms
 and garbage in these days.
This
Linking Words
 lifestyle
,
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apply
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 encourages
community
Add an article
the community
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 to buy too much and consume more than they need in their lives.
In other words
Linking Words
, the individuals in the current century have taken more distance from the culture of
consumerism
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, if something breaks like a mobile phone, we throw it away and buy a new one.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the other issue that the statistic of
waste
Use synonyms
 production has escalated, is advertising. The companies
with
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apply
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use advertising to sell their products and they know that the community
encourage
Wrong verb form
is encouraged
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 by advertisements to buy more than their daily consumption. The Community do not think about
consequences
Correct article usage
the consequences
show examples
 of producing rubbish. The governments teach and conduct local educational workshops for individuals
to
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on
show examples
 how to make less
waste
Use synonyms
 and change their
consumerism
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 model.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the national and local authorities
impose
Verb problem
force
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 the companies to reuse suitable and useful materials on their products.
For example
Linking Words
, the factors that produce electronic devices like cellphones or laptops
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 can use
of
Change preposition
apply
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old devices that
public
Correct article usage
the public
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 use or throw them to build new and more
up to date
Add a hyphen
up-to-date
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 machines or appliances. In conclusion, today’s society has turned to garbage more than before. But the governments by cultivation, correction of the people’s lifestyles and
also
Linking Words
 with a regular and detailed planning in the field of
consumerism
Use synonyms
 can reduce the produced garbage.

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coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas more clearly by dividing them into distinct paragraphs, each dealing with one main idea. This will improve readability and ensure a logical progression of ideas.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and data to support your points. For instance, citing statistics on the increase in waste production or specific government initiatives that have successfully reduced waste in other regions can make your argument stronger.
task achievement
Avoid general statements and focus on explaining your points in more detail. Clarify how the suggested government initiatives would practically work and affect waste production.
task achievement
The essay addresses both parts of the question, identifying the reasons for increased rubbish production and suggesting government actions to mitigate it.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion effectively outline and summarize the main points of the essay, providing a clear framework.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumerism
  • single-use products
  • landfills
  • recycling programs
  • sustainability
  • non-recyclable materials
  • throwaway culture
  • upgrading
  • advertising
  • packaging materials
  • convenience-oriented lifestyles
  • environmental impact
  • infrastructure
  • waste management policies
  • population growth
  • electronic waste (e-waste)
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