More and more serious crimes seem to be committed each year. Some think that the death penalty is the best way to deal with this problem while other people think different measures are more likely to be successful. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

#crimes #year #think #death #penalty #people #measures

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this

modern era, the rate of scandal increases day by day, some people think that criminals should get only the passing penalty,

whereas

, some believe that governments can take other measures to reduce

this

problem. I will discuss both views with relevant examples and will conclude with my own opinions.

To begin

with, the first notion of the expiration penalty does not ensure, that corruption will decrease or not, but it will surely have an impact on the population of the nation, which will decline every year,

moreover

, criminals do not do misconduct always intentionally, sometimes, it happens by mistake or with the unconscious mind and they found guilty.

For example

, 25% prisoners of in the United States are teenagers, who took action

due to

their immaturity and in

this

case, giving the sentence of demise means not giving them another chance to improve themselves or taking from them zero

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

chance to live second.

Consequently

, decreasing sanctions is not the only way to solve

this

issue. On the other side, there are a plethora of steps that can be taken by a prisoner in charge to mitigate the

offense

Change the spelling

offence

show examples

ratio,

such

counseling

Change the spelling

counselling

show examples

sessions for teenagers, knowing about their

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

, and allowing them to pursue their hobbies in their free time, getting to know the problems of people who love to live alone, it will not just improve their

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

towards the public, but it will

also

give another chance to do something better in their life.

For instance

, five

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

of prisoners in the United States got relief from jails

due to

their improved nature.

Lastly

, everyone can become a better person after putting in some effort. To synopsize, I pen down saying that, the loss of life penalty is not only the way to deal with breach problems,

according to

my opinion, the government should take other measures to diminish the ratio of illegal acts.

Submitted by hkaur14165 on Fri Jul 19 2024

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task response

Ensure that your introduction clearly conveys your position and precisely paraphrases the topic. You should present a clearer thesis statement outlining the two views you will discuss.

task response

You have provided relevant examples, but try to be more specific and consistent with your statistics and examples to strengthen your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Work on transitioning more smoothly between paragraphs. Use linking words and phrases to improve flow and coherence throughout your essay.

coherence cohesion

Make sure each paragraph has one main idea, and that idea is well-developed and supported. Avoid overloading paragraphs with multiple concepts.

task response

Your essay covers both sides of the argument, which is crucial for the task.

task response

The conclusion presents a clear opinion which is essential for the effectiveness of the essay.

coherence cohesion

You have made a good effort to provide examples to support your points, demonstrating an understanding of how to develop an argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

319 words

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More and more serious crimes seem to be committed each year. Some think that the death penalty is the best way to deal with this problem while other people think different measures are more likely to be successful. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people believe that governments must apply high taxes to provide good public services for everyone. Give your opinion.

Curiosity can be seen in many ways. Please share an example of how you have demonstrated curiosity and how that has influenced your growth.

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvanatges of being self-employed?

There are many types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Some people say that art subjects such as music, drama and creative writing era an essential part of education, and every school should include them in its syllabus. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your opinion and examples form your own experience.