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in many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. some people say an ageing population creates problemds for governments. other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. to what extend do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages.

#countries #people #population #problemds #governments #society
Life expectancy of human beings is improving in many nations around the world when compared to many years ago. Some individuals are of the opinion that having larger proportions of elderly
people
 will cause more issues to the government.
However
,
this
 essay will discuss the advantages of having more ageing population in society. It is true that when
people
 live longer, it can be burdensome to the authorities
such
 as a rise in the unemployment rate. Nowadays, many old
people
 emphasize living healthy lives which leads them to be physically and mentally strong and fit even after their retirement age.
This
 is evident with the increasing retirement age in the USA is up to 70 years old.
Therefore
, some younger generations find it difficult to be hired and
also
 need to compete for a job with senior citizens for higher positions.
Although
,
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 the joblessness rate in some areas is high
due to
 the working senior citizens, it might not have a negative impact on any community.
On the other hand
, some believe that having a larger number of older
people
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 actually beneficial for
the
Correct article usage
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society by reducing the burden and stress on young couples. Retired parents can help to take care of their grandchildren allowing both
the
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parents to go
work
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to work
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,
thus
 saving the
day care
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daycare
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 expenses. Not only that, both parents can work stress-free knowing their children are in good hands fostering a healthy family life and contributing to the well-being of a community.
Moreover
, many retired
people
 still have their income flowing and good spending power
due to
 their many years of working and they too contribute to the economy flow. In conclusion, having difficulties in finding a job is one of the many drawbacks of
the
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having higher ageing groups but they could
also
 be a great help to
family
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families
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, society and
for
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the nation’s economy.
Therefore
, I firmly agree that there are great positive impacts to having growing senior
people
 in any nation.
Submitted by coke_sars on

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coherence cohesion
Strengthen the logical structure by ensuring a clearer and more coherent flow of ideas between paragraphs.
task achievement
Provide more relevant specific examples to substantiate your points further.
coherence cohesion
Good introduction and conclusion, providing a clear overview and summary of the topic discussed.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task effectively by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of an ageing population.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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