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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Many countries today are experiencing problems associated with noise pollution ( excessive noise pollution above a normal background noise) what are the cause of this phenomenon and what effects does it have on the people affected?

#countries #noise #pollution #background #phenomenon #effects #people
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Nowadays
excessively
Change the word
excessive
show examples
noise
Use synonyms
 has become a major issue in most countries on account of heavy congestion and occasions .
As a result
Linking Words
, people would suffer from various diseases. There are several reasons for excessive
noise
Use synonyms
 in civilian areas.
Firstly
Linking Words
, noises are being produced by the vehicles in traffic jams which raise the levels of sound,
due to
Linking Words
 the poor infrastructure of roads which have been passed by authorities.
Secondly
Linking Words
 , a proportion of sound has been emitted on different occasions by utilising instruments like DJs,
buffers
Correct word choice
and buffers
show examples
 in the middle of the night and during the daytime.
Due to
Linking Words
noise
Use synonyms
 pollution, it will cause directly to the well-being of citizens.Some people would be impaired in hearing as the decibel will surge which is the unit of sound .
Additionally
Linking Words
, civilians would suffer from anxiety as it will affect their brains and spread violence as well. In conclusion,
noise
Use synonyms
 pollution is produced by traffic jams and weddings.As
result
Correct article usage
a result
show examples
, it affects the health of people.
Submitted by sarfaraz.zain619 on

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advice
Strengthen your introduction by providing more context or background information about noise pollution to engage the reader. This will help clarify the scope of your essay.
advice
Expand on the specific sources of noise pollution. For example, you could discuss industrial activities, public events, or construction work in addition to traffic jams and weddings.
advice
Develop your main points further by providing more detailed explanations and relevant examples. This will make your argument more compelling and clear.
advice
Make sure your essay is logically organized with clear connections between ideas. Use transition words and phrases to guide the reader through your argument.
advice
Revise the conclusion to provide a more comprehensive summary of your main points and possibly suggest solutions or recommendations for addressing noise pollution.
positive
You have addressed both the causes and effects of noise pollution, which is essential for the task response criterion.
positive
Your essay uses a straightforward and understandable structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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