IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisions were relevant.

The table below shows the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished. The charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how satisfied they were with their visit, during the same two periods. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisions were relevant.
#numbers #visitors #ashdown #museum #year #show #surveys #visit #two #periods #summarise #information #features #comparisions
The table illustrates
amount
Add an article
the amount
show examples
 of
visitors
 to Ashdown Museum before and after
restoration
. Pie charts
demostrate
Correct your spelling
demonstrate
questionnaire
Correct article usage
a questionnaire
show examples
 of visitor satisfaction.
Overall
,
number
Change the article
the number
show examples
 of
visitors
 to Ashdown
Musemum
Correct your spelling
Museum
 and their enjoyment
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased after the refurbishment. The amount of
visitors
 before the
restoration
 was 74.000. After the refurbishment, the number of
visitors
 was increased 92.000. The table shows
Correct word choice
that
show examples
18.000 more people
visit
Wrong verb form
visited
show examples
 the museum after the
restoration
.
According
Add the preposition
According to
show examples
 the pie charts, people who very satisfied
their
Change preposition
with their
show examples
 visit was increased
15
Change preposition
from 15
show examples
%
percentage
 to 35%.
In addition
, satisfied
visitors
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased after the refurbishment
30
Change preposition
from 30
show examples
% to 40%
percentage
.
Opposite
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the increase, there was
amazing
Correct article usage
an amazing
show examples
 decrease
visitors
Change preposition
in visitors
show examples
 who
dissatisfied
Add a missing verb
were dissatisfied
show examples
. After the
restoration
, the
percentage
 of dissatisfied individuals
was decline
Wrong verb form
declined
show examples
40
Change preposition
from 40
show examples
% to 15%. To parallel
this
,
very
Correct article usage
the very
show examples
 dissatisfied
visitors
percentage
 was
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
to
Change preposition
from
show examples
 10%
percentage
 to 5%.
However
, people who did not answer the survey
was remained
Change to the active voice
remained
has remained
show examples
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
5
Correct article usage
a 5
show examples
%
percentage
both
Change preposition
in both
show examples
chart
Fix the agreement mistake
charts
show examples
.
Submitted by bkardelenyilmazz on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors, restoration, percentage with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 6 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 5 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • visitors
  • refurbishment
  • satisfaction
  • survey
  • percentage
  • increase
  • decrease
  • significant change
  • impact
  • categories
  • implications
  • overall
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