The most important aim of science should be to improve the people's lives . To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#aim #science #people #lives

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These days ,

science

has become a crucial segment of our lives. Some

people

assume that the core objective of

science

should be to better the human's lives . I totally agree with

this

idea and in

this

essay

Add a comma

essay,

show examples

I will support my opinion with examples.

Firstly

science

enlarged the average life span of

people

. In recent years, seven out of eight babies died before reaching their first birthday but now with the advancement in the medical field diseases can be easily controlled.

For instance

, in 2022, American laboratories discovered the COVID-19 vaccine which saved the lives of numerous

people

across the whole world .

Furthermore

,transportation has become more convenient due the

technology

Replace the word

technological

show examples

innovations.

For example

last

year in India NASA inaugurated the automatic driverless train which made the life of

people

too much comfortable . It

also

reduced the travel time and

connects

Wrong verb form

connected

show examples

several stations from Delhi to Hyderabad.

Conversely

, excessive use of

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

makes the children dull and unhealthy because they spend most of their time on

internet

Add an article

the internet

show examples

which weakens their eyesight and they

also

got

Wrong verb form

get

show examples

tired. In conclusion, the main objective of technology must be to

facilitate

Verb problem

provide

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

with modern amenities. I personally think that

science

should make more innovation for the betterment of society .

Submitted by mianraza686 on Mon Jul 22 2024

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introduction conclusion

Your essay would benefit from a clearer introduction and conclusion. While they are present, more specific context about why you agree would strengthen your argument.

supported main points

Ensure each main point is fully developed and clearly explained. For example, adding more details about how scientific advancements in transportation improve lives could enhance your point.

relevant specific examples

While you have given examples, more varied and detailed examples could enrich your essay further. Consider adding examples beyond the medical and transportation fields to show a broader understanding of science's impact.

logical structure

Your essay has a solid logical structure, making it easy to follow your main arguments.

supported main points

You appropriately highlighted significant scientific advancements in medicine and transportation.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

212 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

crucial role
technological advancements
medical discoveries
life-changing inventions
innovations
solutions to human problems
enhancing quality of life
improvement of healthcare
transportation
communication
agriculture
energy sectors
eradication of diseases
prolongation of life expectancy
global challenges
climate change
overpopulation
food security
developed world
underprivileged communities

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The most important aim of science should be to improve the people's lives . To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

Many people think that painting and music do not directly improve the quality of people. Therefore, governments should not spend too much money on artistic projects. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that young people should go to university to further their education while others think they should be encouraged to work as car mechanics or builders etc.to serve society. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

With the rise in popularity of the internet, newspapers will soon become a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think foreign visitors should be charged more than local people when they visit the cultural and historical attractions in a country To what extent do you agree or disagree?