Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people,however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is debatable
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
whether economic progress should be
emphasis
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emphasised
show examples
as a top priority among other aspects for the government worldwide, others argue that other types of progress are equally vital for the nation's success. Both
point
Change to a plural noun
points
show examples
of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
show examples
and opinion toward
this
controversial topic will be elaborated on in
this
essay.
To begin
with, it may
seems
Change the verb form
seem
show examples
sensible for some to believe that economics should be considered as the main goal of a
countries
.
This
is
possibly
Replace the adverb
possible
show examples
because they viewed
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
monetary
supports
Fix the agreement mistake
support
show examples
is
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
the key
for
Change preposition
to
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developing not only specific
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
but the improvement of the
countries
as a whole. Take Africa,
for example
; they encountered
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
various problems
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
financial
Correct pronoun usage
financial ones
show examples
. Many opponents of
this
idea might
opposed
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oppose
be opposed
show examples
that other
dimension
Fix the agreement mistake
dimensions
show examples
besides
financial
Correct article usage
the financial
show examples
of the
countries
must pay attention to it as well. Education,
for example
, the heart of human resources is to cultivate
people
to
atleast
Correct your spelling
at least
literate for
basic
Add an article
a basic
show examples
standard of academic proficiency. A highly educated
peoples
Correct the article-noun agreement
people
show examples
is the key
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
helping
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
countries
to become better as
they
Add a verb
they are
they were
show examples
highly intellectual and often come up with
a
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apply
show examples
good
strategic
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strategies
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for
the
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apply
show examples
improvements. Like China, they
emphasis
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emphasise
show examples
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the education of its
people
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
their
people
often gain rewards and help to develop their
countries
Fix the agreement mistake
country
show examples
to become one of the most powerful
country
Change to a plural noun
countries
show examples
in the world.
However
, I personally argue in favour of focusing
other
Change preposition
on other
show examples
nation
Replace the word
national
show examples
aspects seeing that its importance
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
no different from economics.
To simply
Change preposition
Simply
show examples
explain, without
a healthy and highly educated citizens
Correct the article-noun agreement
healthy and highly educated citizens
a healthy and highly educated citizen
show examples
,
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
success of the country might not
be happened
Change to the active voice
happen
have happened
show examples
.
For instance
, the states, though it is claimed that the most powerful
countries
especially in terms of economic aspects, its criminal rates and slaughters
along with
discrimination toward interracial races
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
surge
Replace the word
surged
show examples
dramatically throughout the centuries. In summary, it is undeniable that economics is crucial and often focused
from
Change preposition
on in
show examples
many
countries
, I am of the opinion that
others dimension
Fix the agreement mistake
other dimensions
show examples
of
country's
Correct article usage
a country's
show examples
progress
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
also
vital and should not be neglected in order to develop a peaceful community for the
people
.
Submitted by kamonluck1999 on

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logical structure
Work on improving the logical structure of your essay. Organizing your essay into clear paragraphs with each one focusing on a single central idea will help. Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.
relevant specific examples
Including more specific examples and expanding on them can illustrate your points better. Consider using detailed scenarios to strengthen your arguments.
clear comprehensive ideas
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammatical accuracy. Small errors can distract the reader and impede understanding. Practice writing precise, varied sentence structures to improve clarity and readability.
introduction conclusion present
You provide a clear introduction and conclusion which frame the essay topic well.
complete response
You cover both sides of the argument which provides a balanced view on the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • standard of living
  • sustainable development
  • social equality
  • environmental degradation
  • cultural heritage
  • technological innovation
  • wealth disparity
  • human development index
  • holistic approach
  • quality of life
  • economic prosperity
  • healthcare system
  • education system
  • cultural diversity
  • policy decisions
What to do next:
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