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Writing Samples
Band 7

The diagrams below give information about two road tunnels in two Australian cities.

The diagrams below give information about two road tunnels in two Australian cities.
The given maps illustrate 2 different types of road tunnels in 2 cities of in Australia. In general, it can be seen that these 2
tunnel
Use synonyms
 systems had several differences, including time of
construction
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, fees, size and the surrounding environment. The
construction
Use synonyms
 price of Tunneltunnel A is half as cheap as that of
Tunnel
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
,
however
Linking Words
,
Tunnel
Use synonyms
 A is much smaller than Tunneltunnel
B
Use synonyms
 in both length and height.
Similarly
Linking Words
, the
construction
Use synonyms
 time of
Tunnel
Use synonyms
 A
also
Linking Words
 took much longer than
Tunnel
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
. The first
tunnel
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, which took 5 years to build, from 1987 to 1992, cost 556 million dollars and was built in the third layer which is below a layer of rock with water on top. Meanwhile,
tunnel
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B
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 only took 3 years to build, less than
Tunnel
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 A 2 years but the
construction
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 fee cost twice that of
Tunnel
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 A, at 1.1 billion dollars, and was constructed beneath the layer of ground which had a road right above. The size of these 2 tunnels was
also
Linking Words
 substantially different,
Tunnel
Use synonyms
 A being 25 meters high and 2.2 kilometres deep, less than
Tunnel
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B
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 10 meters in altitude and 1.4 kilometres in length. The cross-section of the
tunnel
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 A combined total of 4 vehicles,
while
Linking Words
 the capacity of the
tunnel
Use synonyms
B
Use synonyms
 can reach up to 6.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tunnel, construction, b with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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