IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

A friend you made while you were studying abroad has written to ask you for help in finding a job in your country. You have heard about a job in a local company that might be suitable for him/her. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter: tell your friend about the job and what sort of work it involves say why you think the job would be suitable for him/her explain how to apply for the job

#friend #job #country #company #sort #work
Dear Adam, I hope
this
 letter finds you in good health and in the best spirits. I read your letter, I searched a lot to find a suitable job for you and I have seen various positions open for an accountant in “ThoughtWorks Canada.” You can work as an assistant manager of the company Which includes maintaining the paystubs of just its office workers, excluding managers and construction employees. I suggest
this
 job because I think it is the most suitable position for you as you already have 3 years of experience in maintaining accounts.
Moreover
, it is quite easy because you have to manage only one department’s information and they pay you $28 per hour which is a competitive pay rate. To apply for
this
 job either you can visit the main branch hiring office located in Toronto or you can make a LinkedIn profile and visit www.thoughtwork.linkedin.ca to apply for
this
 position. I hope you will consider my reference. Yours faithfully, Navneet Kaur.
Submitted by ss6802125 on

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coherence cohesion
Consider diversifying your sentence structures to enhance the readability and flow of your writing.
task achievement
Provide a bit more detail about the job application process to give clearer guidance.
suitable writing tone
The letter maintains a friendly and supportive tone, which is appropriate for the context.
greeting and closing
A clear greeting and closing provide a good structure to the letter.
single idea per paragraph
Each paragraph focuses on a different aspect of the task, which helps maintain coherence.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • reputation
  • industry
  • duties and responsibilities
  • typical day
  • skills and experiences
  • job requirements
  • company culture
  • personality
  • work ethic
  • application process
  • job listing
  • submit an application
  • documents required
  • tailored resume
  • cover letter
  • relevant experiences
  • reviewing documents
  • practicing for interviews
  • promptly
  • deadlines
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