Some people believe holding sports events are too expensive, such as olympic games,and the world cup. But others think in opponent way. Discuss both opinion, and give your own view.

#people #sports #events #olympic #games #world #cup #opponent

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Most

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

events

Use synonyms

require an enormous amount of financial support from

governments

Use synonyms

, especially regarding well-known international games. In my view, it is extravagant, costing a massive amount of money to host them. Some people are strong advocates of reducing spending on

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

events

Use synonyms

Remove the comma

apply

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since

governments

Use synonyms

would

consequently

Linking Words

be at risk of fiscal deficit, resulting in the instability of society.

Governments

Use synonyms

are compelled to fulfil many duties with a limited budget; in order to service the public more efficiently, they are obligated to control the spending.

Otherwise

Linking Words

, once

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

government spending overtakes its solvency,

governments

Use synonyms

are likely to be dysfunctional, followed by social chaos. Rather than investing huge amounts of money into sporting competitions, it might be more rational to improve the quality of the society's infrastructure, developing robust medical care systems and ensuring more vulnerable groups receive adequate welfare from the government.

This

Linking Words

will help maintain the smooth operation of society.

However

Linking Words

, opponents, argue that hosting massive

sport

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sports

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events

Use synonyms

is advantageous

due to

Linking Words

the way it improves people’s sense of happiness. Many

sports

Use synonyms

events

Use synonyms

are milestones of human civilisation, illustrating people’s aspirations of liberty, strength and fairness. Considering motivation is intrinsic to humanity, continuing the legacy of these traditional activities is crucial in creating social harmony.

For example

Linking Words

, Olympic games are not only entertaining but they

also

Linking Words

inspire people to be more resilient and competent. From my perspective, hosting massive

sports

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events

Use synonyms

would not bring economic loss, paradoxically, it would result in ideal benefits, both financially and politically. Undoubtedly, organising

sports

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events

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demands initial investments for the cost of construction and labour,

however

Linking Words

, it results in strong asset returns in numerous ways,

such

Linking Words

as advertising income, and profit made from ticket and souvenir sales.

Moreover

Linking Words

, hosting

sports

Use synonyms

events

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has a significant international impact, enabling organisers to seize more political resources,

enhancing

Correct word choice

and enhancing

show examples

the country's leadership and reputation globally.

Submitted by Timothy on Tue Jul 23 2024

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task achievement

While your essay is well-organized and provides balanced viewpoints, ensure your introduction clearly introduces both perspectives before stating your own view. This will enhance clarity and engagement from the outset.

task achievement

Try to integrate more specific examples to support your points. For instance, referencing specific Olympic Games or World Cup events and their financial impacts can significantly strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Include a clearer conclusion that succinctly summarizes both sides of the argument and reinforces your own viewpoint. This reinforces your analysis and provides closure.

coherence cohesion

Your essay is structured coherently, with clear paragraphs dedicated to each viewpoint and your own perspective.

coherence cohesion

You provide balanced arguments and consider multiple dimensions of the issue, which enhances the depth of your analysis.

task achievement

The examples you provided, though general, effectively illustrate your points. Developing these further will make your essay even more compelling.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

307 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

infrastructure
financial management
economic benefits
global recognition
investment
displacement
legacy
long-term plan
tourism
job creation
essential services
international image
local economy
financial losses
contextual benefits

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Some people believe holding sports events are too expensive, such as olympic games,and the world cup. But others think in opponent way. Discuss both opinion, and give your own view.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some students take one year off between finishing school and going to university, in order to travel or to work. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

In a number of counties, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

People say it is the responsibility of the residents to keep the environment clean and tidy while others think it is the government's responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion with examples.