In many countries today, women have full-time jobs. Therefore, it is reasonable to share housework equally between men and women. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

In
this
contemporary era, it is argued that both men and
women
should share their household chores equally as nowadays
women
also
having
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
full-time jobs. In my opinion, I completely agree with the statement because it will reduce
burden
Add an article
the burden
show examples
on
women
and
improves
Correct subject-verb agreement
improve
show examples
good family bonding. In conclusion, I wholeheartedly agree that sharing
house works
Correct your spelling
housework
show examples
without any gender inequality is reasonable because it can alliveate the responsibilities that are completely dependent on
women
and by sharing the chores it will bloom the special bond between couples for their stress-free life.
Submitted by chandralekha1993 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Expand your essay to include more detailed supporting points and examples. For instance, you could illustrate how shared housework helps distribute responsibilities effectively or cite specific examples of families who practice this.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph presents a clear, distinct idea. Your essay would benefit from having at least one body paragraph in addition to the introduction and conclusion. This would help break down your arguments more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Improve sentence variety and structures. Try to use complex sentences, conjunctions, and transition words to enhance the readability and flow of your essay.
task achievement
The essay's conclusion reaffirms the stance clearly and concisely, summarizing the key points effectively.
task achievement
The idea of reducing the burden on women and improving family bonding is a relevant and strong argument in favor of sharing housework.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
    What to do next:
    Look at other essays: