IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that it is a good thing for senior manager to have much higher salaries than other workers in a company. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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At
workplace
Add an article
the workplace
show examples
, working on the highest salary is
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
incredible for supervisors as compared to the other associates in a
company
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss that not only
I
Add a missing verb
do I
show examples
believe that
this
Linking Words
 can be
prudent
Add an article
a prudent
show examples
 idea to worth the higher education of
management
Use synonyms
 by giving them more
pays
Correct subject-verb agreement
pay
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
Linking Words
this is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
appreciating working under burden and pressure at jobs.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, getting maximum wages by senior employees at
work
Use synonyms
 can be lucrative for praising the value of their higher studies. Even though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 people do
post graduation
Add a hyphen
post-graduation
show examples
 for
earing
Correct your spelling
earning
show examples
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
 amount of money in the future but
also
Linking Words
 folks
wants
Change the verb form
want
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 to secure their financial expenses by studying hard. Despite
this
Linking Words
, managers positions are
offering
Wrong verb form
offered
show examples
 by
Use synonyms
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
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 for people who have appropriate knowledge of
management
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, individuals do MBD
for achieving
Change preposition
to achieve
show examples
immense
Correct article usage
an immense
show examples
 amount of skills for working in a
company
Use synonyms
 as senior manager and they deserve to get the benefits for
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their
Use synonyms
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
 to get
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
 position rather than working on
minimun
Correct your spelling
minimal
 or
less
Correct word choice
lower
show examples
 payrolls like other workers.
Therefore
Linking Words
, senior
manager
Fix the agreement mistake
managers
show examples
 do
Use synonyms
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
 to achieve a fruitful life
while
Linking Words
 working on
high
Add an article
a high
show examples
 salary.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
immense
Add an article
an immense
the immense
show examples
 amount of
Use synonyms
work load
Correct your spelling
workload
show examples
 and pressure on the
management
Use synonyms
 team represent that they need more
pays
Fix the agreement mistake
pay
show examples
 than other associates.
Due to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, people can do
work
Use synonyms
 more quickly because they
known
Wrong verb form
know
show examples
 that
Use synonyms
company
Correct article usage
the company
show examples
 paying the value of their
Use synonyms
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
. On
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
top of that, not only
Use synonyms
management
Add a missing verb
do management
show examples
 teams have to complete the
work
Use synonyms
 production and provide training to newcomers but
also
Linking Words
 check the
work
Use synonyms
 done by every single
employees
Change to a singular noun
employee
show examples
.
In other words
Linking Words
, double
work
Use synonyms
 has been done by the supervisor as compared to other workers because other employees only complete their
work
Use synonyms
 and go home. Even though, managements have to look at everything properly without
doing
Verb problem
making
show examples
 errors.
Hence
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 is
amazing
Add an article
an amazing
show examples
 thing for managers to get more pay.
To conclude
Linking Words
, working on higher pay rates is
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
lucrative for
management
Use synonyms
 to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
 their needs because they do plenty of
Use synonyms
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
 during working hours
along with
Linking Words
 having a lot of knowledge and skills. As compared to other associates in a
company
Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
 is
seniors
Change noun form
seniors'
senior's
show examples
 right to get more pay.

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task achievement
Try to develop your arguments more comprehensively and in a clearer manner.
task achievement
Ensure that your main ideas are well-supported with relevant and specific examples.
coherence cohesion
Work on organizing your essay more logically to enhance readability and flow.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next, and your main points are clearly linked.
task achievement
The essay clearly presents a position on the topic.
coherence cohesion
There is a clear introduction and conclusion.
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