Some people think that competitive sports have a positive effect on the child’s education, while others argue it is not so. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages, and your opinion.

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In recent times,
sports
competition
Fix the agreement mistake
competitions
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are among
equipped
Verb problem
the best
show examples
in the high school curriculum. There is a growing belief that competitive
sports
enage
Correct your spelling
engage
in providing a profound impact on the child's education,
while
others
are
Verb problem
do
show examples
not support
this
idea. I would argue that
sports
contests have pros and cons.
This
essay will examine the argument. First and foremost,
sports
play a crucial role contributing in
the
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to the
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educational system. Football league,
for instance
, in the USA high school, government have placed sport time, twice per week as they believe that physical activities can improve students' physical health and mental resilience.
Due to
numerous activities have been involved during the training session.
Therefore
, they can learn how to
exacerbate
Verb problem
improve
show examples
their health to be better, self-control, and well-being
while
they are playing
sports
.
On the other hand
, there is the
contrast
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contrasting
show examples
idea
about
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that
show examples
physical games can
cause
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have
show examples
negative impacts on their
children
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children's
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studies. In some cases, children cannot control their
feeling
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feelings
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,
while
they
were
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are
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falling
in
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into
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a particular competition.
This
, in
turns
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turn
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,
diminishing
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diminishes
show examples
the academic
persuit
Correct your spelling
pursuit
pursuits
. Some
ends
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end
show examples
up not going to school since they are
embarrassing
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embarrassed
show examples
from
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by
show examples
their classmates
due to
their failure.
Furthermore
, those who aim to get the winner will fall apart and lead to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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depression.
Consequently
, some parents
are
Verb problem
do
show examples
not allow their kids to play
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
, and
focusing
Wrong verb form
focus
show examples
only studies. In conclusion,
sports
competitions
carry out
Verb problem
have
show examples
pros and cons.
Although
there are several negative aspects,
such
as they will be reducing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
study motivation, and
possessing
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apply
show examples
mental issues, I firmly believe that the
positivie
Correct your spelling
positive
impact of
sports
can help children
enable
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apply
show examples
to have health stronger and
psychologically
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psychological
show examples
resilience.
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grammar vocabulary
Work on grammatical accuracy and lexicon development. Some errors and awkward phrases detract from clarity and comprehension.
examples
Include more detailed examples to support your arguments for a stronger task achievement score. Specific examples help illustrate your points more clearly.
structure
Strengthen the logical structure by ensuring each paragraph effectively develops a main point. Transition smoothly between ideas for better coherence.
task response
The essay addresses both sides of the argument, which is crucial for a well-rounded discussion.
examples
The use of an example (the football league in the USA) helps to illustrate your point about the benefits of physical activities.
structure
The presence of an introduction and conclusion contributes to overall cohesion and helps frame the essay effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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