Some people say History is one of most important school subjects other people think that, in today world,subject like science and technology are more important than History.Discuss both these views and give your opinion
Nowadays, Some individuals believe that
History
is more vital than other lessons while
other people
say that Technology
and Science
lessons are way more significant than History
in today's world. In this
essay I am going to discuss both perspectives and also
I argued
that Wrong verb form
argue
Science
and Tecnology
Correct your spelling
technology
subjects
are more crucial than History
right now.
On the one hand, History
is such
an important subject. Studying history
makes people
more sensitive to social movements and helps them understand the consequences of past events. For instance
, If a person knows about old rebellions, revolutions and their results they might be more aware about
what is going to happen next or what they going to get Change the preposition
of
at the end
. Therefore
, History
makes people
more sensitive about social movements and learning lessons about great people
's fails
.
Replace the word
failures
On the other hand
, Subjects
such
as Science
and Technology
are more relevant and beneficial for people
's life
. Scientific and Technological developments make Fix the agreement mistake
lives
people
's live
easier, healthier, quicker and Replace the word
lives
modernize
. Wrong verb form
modernised
For example
, improvements
in Change preposition
with improvements
technology
people
invented electiricity
, Correct your spelling
electricity
internet
, Correct article usage
the internet
wheel
and some uncountable products which make Change the article
the wheel
world
Add an article
the world
more
quicker, easier and Change the word
apply
modernize
. Wrong verb form
modernised
Spesifically
, if some Correct your spelling
Specifically
people
want to text their friend they have to write a letter, then
take it to post
office, post it and Correct article usage
the post
wait
their friend's response. Add the preposition
wait for
However
, Due to
technological advances, people
can now send a text message instantly with just a click of a button without efforts
. Fix the agreement mistake
effort
Furthermore
, new advances in Science
makes
Correct subject-verb agreement
make
people
more healthier. In today's world, so many vital ilnesses
have vaccines . Correct your spelling
illnesses
Hence
, progresses
in Correct subject-verb agreement
progress
Science
and Technology
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
life
easier and healthier than ever.
In conclusion, some think that History
is one of the most significant school lesson
. Change to a plural noun
lessons
By contrast
, others argue that Science
and Technology
subjects
are more critical than History
and also
I believe that Science
and Technology
is
more important because developments in these Change the verb form
are
subjects
are more beneficial to people
's life
than Fix the agreement mistake
lives
history
. It makes life
healthier, faster, easier and contemporary
.Correct quantifier usage
more contemporary
Submitted by taylanpolat6124 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure to maintain consistency and clarity throughout the essay. Some parts, such as the second paragraph, could be more cohesive and clearly linked to your opinion.
task achievement
Work on grammatical accuracy and sentence structures. Simple mistakes, for instance in subject-verb agreement and capitalization, can detract from the overall quality of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Avoid redundancy and repetition. For example, instead of saying 'makes life easier, healthier, quicker, and modernize,' you can say 'improve quality of life significantly.'
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are thoughtfully written, clearly presenting both viewpoints and stating your own opinion.
task achievement
You provide relevant examples to support your discussion, such as advances in technology making communication quicker and medical advances making people healthier.
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