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The diagram below illustrates the process where bricks are made for the building industry. Summarie the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. The diagram below illustrates the process where bricks are made for the building industry. Summarie the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below illustrates the process where bricks are made for the building industry. Summarie the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. The diagram below illustrates the process where bricks are made for the building industry. Summarie the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#process #bricks #industry #summarie #information #features #comparisons
The process diagram elaborates
the
Change preposition
on the
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 steps in the preparation of
clay
bricks
 at the industrial level.
Overall
, the total process involves seven steps, starting from the
clay
 ( key material ) until the newly prepared
bricks
 are
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
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distributed among the customers.
First,
the key ingredient, the
clay
 is digged by large diggers .
Secondly
, those large
clay
 chunks are crushed by rollers and a metal grid.
Then
, the fine
clay
 particles are mixed with sand and water, before they are being
cutted
Correct your spelling
cut
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 by the use of moulds manually, or by wire cutters mechanically. After those wet raw
bricks
 are dried inside drying ovens for about 1 to 2 days,
the next step is
 started.
Subsequently
,
the next step
is occurred
Change to the active voice
occurs
has occurred
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 inside the kiln which has three steps.
Initially
, the
bricks
 are moderately heated in
200
Correct article usage
the 200
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celcius
Change the capitalization
Celcius
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 to 980
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
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 range. After that, the
bricks
 are exposed to the high temperature of around 870
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
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 to 2300
celsius
Capitalize word
Celsius
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 and
there-after
Correct your spelling
thereafter
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 they are directed to the cooling chamber where they are chilled for about 2 to 3 days.
Finally
, the baked
bricks
 are packed nicely and delivered to the customers by using large lorries.
Submitted by oriexam6 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "the next step is".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words clay, bricks with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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