IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.The line graph below shows changes in the amount and type of fast food consumed by Australian teenagers from 1975 to 2000.Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.Write at least 150 words.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.The line graph below shows changes in the amount and type of fast food consumed by Australian teenagers from 1975 to 2000.Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.Write at least 150 words.
#minutes #line #changes #amount #type #food #australian #teenagers #information #features #comparisons
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The line graph depicts changes in the consumption and kind of fast food
ate
Change the form of the verb
eaten
show examples
 by Australian teenagers between 1975
until
Correct word choice
and
show examples
 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, between
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
 types of food, only fish and chips
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
experience
Wrong verb form
experienced
show examples
Correct article usage
a decreased
show examples
decreased
Replace the word
decrease
show examples
. The others are constantly increased from time to time.
First,
Linking Words
in 1975, pizza was consumed by Australian teenagers approximately 8
times
Use synonyms
. Surprisingly, the interest
to consume
Change preposition
in consuming
show examples
 pizza continuously up until hit
the
Change the word
its
show examples
 peak at 82
times
Use synonyms
 in 1995.
Then
Linking Words
, from 1995 to 2000, the consumption was flat. Moving to others, hamburgers had
starting
Correct article usage
a starting
show examples
 point about 10
times
Use synonyms
.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, steadily rose
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to 82
times
Use synonyms
 in
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 1985. But, same as pizza, hamburgers
stucked
Correct your spelling
stuck
stacked
 in 1995 to 2000 at 100
times
Use synonyms
.
Initially
Linking Words
, fish and chips had a good start by 100
times
Use synonyms
 in 1975. In 1980, hit the valley
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
82
times
Use synonyms
.
Next,
Linking Words
continually experienced fluctuations until 1985. Afterwards, significantly slumped to 40
times
Use synonyms
 in 2000. Respectively in 1985, 1990, 1995, and 2000.
Submitted by wishmeluck  on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words times with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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