Maintaining public libraries is now a waste of money since computer technology is already replacing their function. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#libraries #waste #money #computer #technology #function

In the past, people study and search

information

Change preposition

for information

show examples

by going to public

library

Fix the agreement mistake

libraries

show examples

By picking

Change preposition

Picking

show examples

, reading over or borrowing

books

home

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

made a new job ,

who

Correct word choice

show examples

managed

Wrong verb form

managing

show examples

and

collected

Wrong verb form

collecting

show examples

the

books

,called

librarian

Add an article

a librarian

show examples

. Librarians

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

crucial because they

can

Wrong verb form

could

show examples

make

Verb problem

put

show examples

the

books

in the right places

that

Correct word choice

so that

show examples

people

can

Wrong verb form

could

show examples

easily

access

Correct pronoun usage

access them

show examples

. Nowadays, technology involves our lives so much.

Human

Fix the agreement mistake

Humans

show examples

google

Capitalize word

Google

show examples

to ask

what they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

question

Correct subject-verb agreement

questions

show examples

. There

are

Change the verb form

show examples

no need to get on

bus

Correct article usage

a bus

show examples

then

Correct word choice

and then

show examples

go to a

library

to get only one book anymore. So, decreasing in number of libraries is reasonable.

Therefore

sadly librarians got fired.

However

, libraries are not only information sources but

also

they are

cultural

Add an article

a cultural

show examples

expression. In Thailand m there is a national

library

that anybody can go there to

learning

Wrong verb form

learn

show examples

Thai

cultures

Fix the agreement mistake

culture

show examples

. some old

books

that recorded historical theory cannot be searched

from

Change preposition

show examples

Correct article usage

the internat

show examples

internat

Correct your spelling

Internet

but they are only in the book at

this

library

. In conclusion , there are some reasons that we should spend money to maintain some libraries that are vital for

historical

Add an article

the historical

show examples

part of

country

Add an article

the country

show examples

. By the way , we can

also

use

computer

Add an article

a computer

the computer

show examples

to arrange the system of the

books

Submitted by itsmeatommm on Fri Jul 26 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on developing a more organized structure. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that these ideas logically connect throughout the essay.

coherence cohesion

Improve the introduction to clearly outline your stance and what the essay will discuss. Similarly, the conclusion should succinctly summarize the key points made and restate your position.

task achievement

Include more detailed and specific examples to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and comprehensive.

task achievement

Clarify your main ideas. Make sure your points are directly related to the topic and are clearly and comprehensively explained.

task achievement

You’ve made some good points about the relevance of libraries as cultural institutions and their importance in preserving historical records.

coherence cohesion

Your essay includes a conclusion which summarizes your main points and reaffirms your stance.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

192 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Maintaining public libraries is now a waste of money since computer technology is already replacing their function. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+