Some people think that the government is wasting money on the art and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?
it is being argued that
government
should not expenditure on art, it should Correct article usage
the government
spent
on other Change the verb form
be spent
spend
benefical
public services. Correct your spelling
beneficial
This
essay, however
, strongly disagrees with this
statement . arts
are the various practices formed which illustrate culture
and Correct article usage
the culture
history
of particular
nation Add an article
the particular
a particular
as well as
it
can Correct pronoun usage
apply
also
generate revenue like Correct your spelling
other
othe
public services
first off , art plays Correct your spelling
other
vital
role Add an article
a vital
to represent
Change preposition
in representing
history
and Correct article usage
the history
culture
of a nation. government
should not stop to
spending on Change preposition
apply
arts
if they do so, upcoming generations would not be able to get familiar with history
and culture
. which leads to young
generation Correct article usage
the young
would
not Verb problem
apply
recognise
their historic places as Wrong verb form
recognising
it
would be destroyed or damaged Correct pronoun usage
they
due to
lack of money
. For instance
, the golden temple
and Correct your spelling
Golden Temple
red fort
which are located in Correct your spelling
Red Fort
india
, are well maintained by Change the capitalization
India
government
which leads Correct article usage
the government
that
youngster of Correct determiner usage
apply
india
attached or familiar with their Change the capitalization
India
culture
and religion.
secondly
, investing money
on
Change preposition
in
arts
would be also
profitable like others
public services even Correct quantifier usage
other
more
if Correct quantifier usage
apply
government
take
care of historic and cultural buildings, Wrong verb form
took
statue
, Fix the agreement mistake
statues
painting
it Correct word choice
and painting
leads
to Wrong verb form
would lead
centre
of attraction for domestic Correct article usage
a centre
as well as
international tourism which would circulate more money
in
the country. Change preposition
into
for example
In india
, Change the capitalization
India
golden temple
and Correct your spelling
Golden Temple
red fort
are the Correct your spelling
Red Fort
hub
of tourism which Fix the agreement mistake
hubs
contributes
3% of Correct subject-verb agreement
contribute
in
the Change preposition
apply
nation
economy
Change noun form
nation's
IN
conclusion, Correct your spelling
In
i
strongly oppose Change the capitalization
I
of
the statement and Change preposition
apply
i
believe if Change the capitalization
I
government
keep Correct your spelling
spending
spenting
Correct your spelling
spending
money
on arts
it could preserve the culture
and history
as well as
helps to generate more revenueSubmitted by amarbatth367 on
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grammar
Work on improving sentence structure and grammar to make your ideas clearer. For example, 'spent' should be 'spend' and 'leads that' should be 'ensures that.'
supporting evidence
Add more specific examples or data to support your points. This will make your argument stronger and more persuasive.
content
You address multiple reasons why government spending on art is important, such as preserving culture and generating revenue through tourism.
examples
The essay provides relevant examples like the Golden Temple and Red Fort to support the claims.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.