In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#countries #world #people #cities #population #countryside #development

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In many countries, society who used to live in rural areas are now moving to metropolis. Even though many public argue that it is a positive development, I believe it is a negative development for the region. In

this

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essay, I will discuss the effects of urban migration and the drawbacks it poses. Many communities want to live in a metropolis with more opportunities for their lives, but

this

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causes overpopulation in

cities

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. Overpopulation in

cities

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is not a good sign because it will lead to many problems. Some problems that will arise include housing shortages, traffic congestion, and higher competition for jobs. In some metropolitan

cities

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, the comparison between the land for house development and the population who live there is not balanced,

Correct pronoun usage

which

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causes a higher price of the land, and with

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effect, many

people

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will become homeless in big

cities

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. Not only that, the more

people

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who live in the

cities

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, the higher the cost of living will be.

Furthermore

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, in rural areas, there will be a limited number of

people

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who can take care of them, especially in terms of agriculture. Because some of the sources of food

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as rice, vegetables, and fruits, are obtained in the countryside, if many

people

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want to leave, it will be a problem and will have negative effects. It will affect the local economy and limit the food supply,

therefore

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, creating a compound effect. In conclusion,

although

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moving from rural areas to

cities

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has some positive developments, it

also

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causes problems for a long period of time.

Therefore

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, governments must

also

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be proactive in taking care of the countryside and ensuring the population in the

cities

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and countryside is balanced.

Submitted by inekemargareta20 on Sat Jul 27 2024

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relevant specific examples

You present a clear position on the topic and explain your reasoning. However, aim to integrate more specific examples and statistical data to strengthen the argument and make it more substantial.

clear comprehensive ideas

Work on refining your ideas further to ensure that each paragraph introduces a new unique point and doesn't repeat previous arguments. This will improve the flow and coherence of your essay.

logical structure

Your essay is mostly well-organized, but including connecting phrases and transition words at the beginning of each paragraph can help improve the logical structure and make your essay more cohesive.

introduction conclusion present

You have a strong introduction and conclusion, clearly stating your position on the issue and summarizing your main points effectively.

complete response

You provide relevant arguments showing an understanding of the negative effects of urban migration. This helps in achieving the task response effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

282 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

rural-to-urban migration
population shift
positive impact
negative impact
urbanization
job opportunities
access to education
access to healthcare
urban infrastructure
rural traditions
cultural heritage

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In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people say that what individuals do to protect cannot make difference, others say that individuals can protect environment. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays the differences between countries are becoming less evident because people follow the same media. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?