In recent years, many small local shops have closed because band customers travel to large shopping centre or malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or a negative development?
Over the
last
few years environment is
suffering from Wrong verb form
has been
plastic
waste had become one of the major problem
that people should pay attentionChange to a plural noun
problems
.
In Change preposition
to.
this
essay
I will bring some viable solutions for Add a comma
essay,
this
problem.
According to
the statistics every year million
Fix the agreement mistake
millions
tons
of rubbish which includes Change preposition
of tons
plastic
items are thrown to
the Change preposition
into
world
Change noun form
world's
ocean
and Fix the agreement mistake
oceans
remaining
Correct article usage
the remaining
of
them are burned. Change preposition
apply
Consequently
, the
nature is being hurt by two aspects. Correct article usage
apply
Firstly
, many types of the
animals, living under the ocean become Correct article usage
apply
exict
. Correct your spelling
extinct
Additionally
, smoke bring
big damage Change the verb form
brings
for
Change preposition
to
atmosphere
.
Correct article usage
the atmosphere
Although
,
the problems I have mentioned above are really serious, there are several ways residents and government can do to solve them. Remove the comma
apply
Initially
, plastic
things ought to be recycled instead
of producing new ones. Since,
it may Remove the comma
apply
impact to
reduce the amount of Verb problem
apply
the
waste and directly Correct article usage
apply
damaging to
Wrong verb form
damage
the
natural sourcesCorrect article usage
apply
well
. What is more, Rephrase
apply
government
have to produce Add an article
the government
productions
which we need in our daily life from Replace the word
products
another materials
, not from Replace the adjective
another material
other materials
plastic
. For
instance
Add a comma
instance,
is
, Unnecessary verb
apply
we
use Correct word choice
if we
plastic
packages it is easy to exist it
without any hurts to Correct pronoun usage
apply
the
nature. AsCorrect article usage
apply
,
it may be Remove the comma
apply
great
way Change the article
a great
for
Change preposition
to
descending
Verb problem
decrease
damaging
rate.
To summarize, nowadays, the most problematic issue is Correct article usage
the damaging
plastic
productions
which may Fix the agreement mistake
production
harmful
Add a missing verb
be harmful
for
the environment Change preposition
to
however
, there are some effective solutions for this
issu
.Correct your spelling
issue
Submitted by shakhzod0905 on
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task but does so in a somewhat limited manner. Ensure to fully develop your ideas and use more supporting details and specific examples.
coherence cohesion
Your essay's structure could be more logically organized. Make sure your main points are clearly related to one another, and use transition words to create a smoother flow between ideas.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, consider providing more specific examples and elaborating on your proposed solutions. Explaining how these solutions can practically be implemented will strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Improve coherence and cohesion by clearly connecting each paragraph to the main thesis. Use concluding sentences for each paragraph to summarize its main points and link them to the next section.
task achievement
You have identified a significant problem (plastic waste) and proposed solutions, which addresses the task's requirements.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, making it easier for the reader to follow the structure.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example