In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and dis advantages of giving children this message?

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In several cultures,
children
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are frequently told that they can achieve anything if they work hard for it. It is more like a
doctrin
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doctor
to the
children
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so they will always give the best they can do to pursue their
dream
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.
However
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,
world
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the world
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does not work like
this
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. There are some conditions
which
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in which
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people have
been try
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tried
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anything but still fail. It is
such
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a good thing if the parents want their kids to give 100 per cent in
eveything
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everything
they do. It will
stimulates
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stimulate
show examples
the
children
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to not easily give up
for
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on
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their
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the
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dream
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that they are striving for. By having
this
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mindset, it will
creates
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create
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a child who
have
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has
show examples
ambitions and purposes in life. To illustrate, my brother
want
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wants
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to get
grade
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an grade
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A+ on math subjects yet he
does
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is
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not good at math. Since he has
this
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spirit, he
willing
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is willing
show examples
to study seriously and
using
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use
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his free time to learn. So, it has
good
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a good
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impacts
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impact
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for
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on
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children
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children's
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developments
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development
show examples
and growth when facing struggles. On the other sides, it
can
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cannot
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be denied that everything
is
Verb problem
does
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not always work as we want. There are some cases
which
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in which
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we failed even though we already tried our best.
For instance
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, my friend had
this
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kind of thought.
Everytime
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Every time
show examples
she failed, she
try
Wrong verb form
tried
show examples
harder and harder. Eventually, she
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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still can not gain her
dream
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. Everyone told her about
this
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but no one said that we can not always achieve our
dream
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.
To conclude
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, the
disadvantage
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disadvantages
show examples
is
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apply
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outweigh
than
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apply
show examples
the
advantage
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advantages
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because
this
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thought will shape a bad mentality for people who
is
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are
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trying to
get
Verb problem
achieve
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their
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dream
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dreams
show examples
.
In other words
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, people have to know their
limit
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limits
show examples
and it is totally fine to fail.
Submitted by wishmeluck  on

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Grammar
Make sure to use consistent verb tenses throughout your essay. For example, "create" should be "creates" and "try" should be "tries."
Structure
Make your introduction and conclusion more concise to clearly set up and wrap up the main points of your essay.
Examples/Development
Expand on your examples to clearly show how they support your main points. For instance, explain the consequences for your friend who kept trying but still failed.
Content
The essay presents a balanced view by discussing both advantages and disadvantages.
Examples
Personal examples are used to illustrate points, which can make the argument more relatable.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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