Traditions are about the past and innovation is about the future, and it has been argued that we need to let go of traditions for the sake of progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this? What role should traditions have in our lives? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Traditions
normally created by society
it has
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
been shaped by
cultures
Correct article usage
the cultures
show examples
and habits
by
Change preposition
of
show examples
a community for
long
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a long
show examples
time.
While
innovation
is the idea
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
creating, shaping, and helping society in the future. Some argue that
traditions
must be abandoned to foster progress, but I disagree with
this
statement. I believe both
traditions
and
innovation
are playing
significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
role in our lives. On the one hand, tradition is
cultural
Add an article
the cultural
a cultural
show examples
backbone
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
society. It
is providing
Wrong verb form
provides
show examples
identity and continuity. They connect to us in history and heritage,
this
background that shaping us now.
For instance
, in
Indonesia
Add a comma
Indonesia,
show examples
we have "
batik
". It is
technique
Add an article
a technique
the technique
show examples
of producing
Add an article
a colored
show examples
colored
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coloured
show examples
design
Fix the agreement mistake
designs
show examples
on
textile
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textiles
show examples
, it creates
pattern
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patterns
show examples
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
hand-made,
every
Correct word choice
and every
show examples
fabric has
unique
Add an article
a unique
show examples
design. It takes
million
Correct article usage
a million
show examples
rupiahs for one piece of
batik
. The weaknesses of traditional ways,
firstly
because it is hand-made, it will take
long
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a long
show examples
time to finish
for
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apply
show examples
one fabric.
Secondly
, if
wrong
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the wrong
show examples
pattern
cannot
be undo
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be undone
show examples
.
Lastly
, the production is limited.
On the other hand
,
innovation
is vital for development and improvement, it
is offered
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offers
show examples
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
advancement. In the modern era,
batik
able
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is able
show examples
to print. There are a lot of
manufacture
Replace the word
manufacturers
show examples
producing
print-
Correct your spelling
print batik
show examples
batik
. Now people can produce hundreds
batik
Change preposition
of batik
show examples
a month,
minimize
Wrong verb form
minimising
show examples
risk
Correct article usage
the risk
show examples
wrong
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of wrong
show examples
pattern
Fix the agreement mistake
patterns
show examples
because the
mechine
Correct your spelling
machine
able to set up the
pattern
and variety of
design
Fix the agreement mistake
designs
show examples
.
The technology
Correct article usage
Technology
show examples
is very beneficial for the
economic
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economy
show examples
due to
mass
productions
Fix the agreement mistake
production
show examples
. In conclusion, I believe that
traditions
provide
foundation
Add an article
the foundation
a foundation
show examples
for continuity and stability in our lives,
therefore
we cannot let it go.
While
innovation
drive
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drives
show examples
us to make
improvement
Fix the agreement mistake
improvements
show examples
.
By finding
Change preposition
Finding
show examples
balance and relevance
both
Change preposition
in both
show examples
tradition and
innovation
would be beneficial for our lives in the future.
Submitted by desimardianti0590 on

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grammar
Make sure to proofread your essay to catch and correct grammatical errors, such as missing articles or incorrect verb forms. For example, 'a long time' instead of 'long time,' and 'the pattern cannot be undone' instead of 'cannot be undo.'
structure
Ensure your essay has a clear and logical structure. Try to introduce your main ideas more explicitly in each paragraph. For instance, state the main idea clearly at the start of each paragraph to make it easy for the reader to follow your argument.
development
Expand on your ideas with more detailed explanations and examples. For instance, you could discuss how traditions can coexist with innovation in more areas than just batik production.
balanced view
Your essay addresses both traditions and innovation, providing a balanced view on how they can coexist in society.
examples
You provided a relevant and specific example of 'batik' from Indonesia to illustrate your point, which makes your argument more convincing.
conclusion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reiterates your stance, providing a clear and concise closure to the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • heritage
  • continuity
  • progress
  • innovative
  • cultures
  • societal advances
  • integration
  • cultural tapestry
  • ideologies
  • reconciled
  • evolved
  • adapted
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