Many people believe that the increasing number of cars in cities is immense ‎pollution and waste. Others think that industries are the ones causing ‎pollution. Discuss both views, and give your opinion.‎

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is controversial to say the increasing number of
cars
in
cities
are
problems
Fix the agreement mistake
problem
show examples
caused by
industries
. No
mather
Correct your spelling
matter
show examples
what, the
cars
in
cities
make
Verb problem
cause
show examples
pollution.
First,
people who think the
increase
Replace the word
increased
show examples
number of
cars
in
cities
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
necessary, because of the population and
capitilazation
Correct your spelling
capitalization
idea in
peoples
Change noun form
people's
show examples
head
Fix the agreement mistake
heads
show examples
.
However
, they
also
agree that
cars
can destroy our
enviorament
Correct your spelling
environment
, and it already started to
destroy
Correct pronoun usage
destroy it
show examples
.
Moreover
, the idea of public transport has to be done by everybody.
Furthermore
Add a comma
Furthermore,
show examples
not
everyone
is the same, the idea of transportation with buses, trains or whatever, might sound terrible to someone, why would some car driver stop using their car for better
enviorament
Correct your spelling
environment
when
everyone
still drives their
cars
. Even though there are people who keep the belief
of
Change preposition
that
show examples
using
bicyles
Correct your spelling
bicycles
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
also
an opportunity for those who like the private
area's
Change noun form
areas
show examples
of
cars
, bicycles are not that useful if you think about it seriously. I stand with
thoose
Correct your spelling
those
who believe that we have to start from somewhere. It won't happen if nobody tries. Someone has to start using public transport or
bicycle's
Change the noun form
bicycles
bicycle
show examples
. The real problem with pollution and waste is about people, not
industries
,
industries
just doing their jobs because of other's needs.
Neverthless
Correct your spelling
Nevertheless
, it might be beneficial if
industries
start working on public
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
show examples
more, I think that if
everyone
has a private space in public transport, where they can feel free, they will start using it more, because of the things they can do like eat, read or sleep
while
going somewhere. In conclusion, they are too many opinions on both ideas, it is nearly impossible to make
everyone
happy, so the best way is
making
Change the verb form
to make
show examples
Correct article usage
the enviorament
show examples
enviorament
Correct your spelling
environment
happy, by reducing car numbers in
cities
.
This
can be
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
start of
very
Correct article usage
a very
show examples
beneficial programme in the future.
Submitted by enver07600 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

organization
Your essay could benefit from a more organized structure. Start with an introduction that clearly presents the topic and your opinion. Each body paragraph should discuss a single point clearly and thoroughly.
supporting points
Ensure to support your points with relevant and specific examples. This will make your argument stronger and more convincing.
language use
Focus on using precise vocabulary and correct grammatical structures to enhance your ideas and arguments.
task achievement
You have presented both views and given a clear opinion, which is essential for this essay type.
topic understanding
Your writing demonstrates an understanding of the topic and awareness of differing viewpoints.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • urban congestion
  • air quality
  • emission standards
  • greenhouse gases
  • carbon footprint
  • toxic emissions
  • environmental regulations
  • sustainable practices
  • clean technology
  • public health concerns
  • mitigation strategies
  • noise pollution
  • renewable energy
  • electric vehicles
  • industrial waste
What to do next:
Look at other essays: