In many countries, there is an increasing trend in using mobile phone apps for payment purpose instead of old way of cash handling. What is your opinion. Explain with examples.

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There is no doubt that these days a lot of countries use
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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mobile phone apps for
payment
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

the question is do think that
payment
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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mobile
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones

It seems that phone may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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is very
imortanat
Correct your spelling
important

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in our life
our
Correct your spelling
or

The word our doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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not ? , in
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay
iam
Correct your spelling
I am

If you don’t want iam to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

going to talk about
payment
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

method
Fix the agreement mistake
methods

It seems that method may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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before comparison
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

day . In
trems
Correct your spelling
terms

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of
advantaged
Replace the word
advantages

The word advantaged doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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about online
payment
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

The main reason
gaiven
Correct your spelling
given

If you don’t want gaiven to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

to support
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

claim is that
its
Correct your spelling
it's

The word its doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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easier and increase time . To illustrate , if I buy something there is no need to return the remaining amount .
In other words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
phone apps for
payment
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

its
importnat
Correct your spelling
important

If you don’t want importnat to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

for
a
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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many
resons
Correct your spelling
reasons

If you don’t want resons to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the main point of mobile
payment
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is multiple first of all , to provide
Correct article usage
a save

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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save
Replace the word
safe

The word save doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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card in the wallet ,
Also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

can people
used
Wrong verb form
use

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb used. Consider changing it.

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the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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apple pay when
there
Correct pronoun usage
they

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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lose
theret
Correct your spelling
their

If you don’t want theret to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

card paymen .

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coherence cohesion
Work on organizing your essay better. Make sure to have clear paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion. Each body paragraph should have one main idea.
introduction conclusion present
Improve your introductory paragraph. It should introduce the main topic and outline what you will discuss in the essay.
supported main points
Support your main points with more specific examples. For instance, you can mention popular mobile payment apps and how they are used in real life scenarios.
complete response
Address counter-arguments or discuss potential disadvantages of mobile payments to give a balanced view and achieve a more complete response.
clear comprehensive ideas
Be sure to clearly state your opinion on the topic at the beginning and the conclusion of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Correct small grammar and spelling errors to make your essay clearer and more professional.
task achievement
You have identified some key advantages of mobile payments, such as convenience and saving time.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your essay touches on relevant aspects of mobile payments, making it clear that you are aware of the topic's significance.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Digital wallet
  • Cryptocurrency
  • Cashless society
  • Mobile banking
  • Contactless payment
  • Financial literacy
  • Cybersecurity
  • Transaction fees
  • Near Field Communication (NFC)
  • Peer-to-peer (P2P) transfer
What to do next:
Look at other essays: