IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people belive that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory jo or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #belive #situation #jo #shortage #money #situations
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is no doubt that
Linking Words
this days
Change the determiner
this day
these days
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 think there is no need to
try
Add the particle
try to
show examples
 develop
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
situation
Use synonyms
 . the question is did the
stuation
Correct your spelling
situation
its
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
not matter
Change preposition
in copmarison
show examples
copmarison
Correct your spelling
comparison
 with
get
Change the verb form
getting
show examples
money
Use synonyms
 ? In
this
Linking Words
 essay,
iam
Correct your spelling
I am
 going to talk about some
people
Use synonyms
 who think that
money
Use synonyms
its
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
matter
Correct subject-verb agreement
matters
show examples
than
Correct quantifier usage
more than
show examples
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
stuation
Correct your spelling
situation
. In terms of
advantaged
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 can develop
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
situation
Use synonyms
Linking Words
although
Change preposition
through
show examples
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
multiple methods , First of all , the main reason given to support
this
Linking Words
 claim is that Islam
order
Change the verb form
orders
show examples
 us to trust in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
god in everything ,
Also
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
cant
Correct your spelling
can't
show examples
 give up in the face of adversity . To illustrate ,
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 there
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 poor and they
have
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 to try to
being
Change the verb
be
show examples
 better to get a lot of
money
Use synonyms
 and save their
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 for
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
 and their can in the face of adversity . In other words , we infer can could any ove get the
life
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
they
wont
Correct your spelling
want
show examples
.
Morever
Correct your spelling
Moreover
, can any person in
this
Linking Words
 world develop dreams by doing difficult
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
Firstly
Linking Words
 , no
onr
Correct your spelling
one
 can get which there
wont
Add an apostrophe
won't
show examples
excaptfor
Correct your spelling
except for
 those who
wourks
Correct your spelling
works
work
 in
diffcult
Correct your spelling
difficult
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, if
people
Use synonyms
dcrease
Correct your spelling
decrease
increase
work
Use synonyms
their
Change the pronoun
them
show examples
 can have more rewards
this
Linking Words
 is because
Use synonyms
Change preposition
of thier
show examples
thier
Correct your spelling
their
work
Use synonyms
 ,
Also
Linking Words
 , the
people
Use synonyms
 who seek to improve
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
situation
Use synonyms
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will get a lot of
money
Use synonyms
 and can buy anything there
wont
Add an apostrophe
won't
show examples
 without hesitation and save
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
life
Use synonyms
 with
money
Use synonyms
 and
theye
Correct your spelling
they
 can have in face of adversity with society . In conclusion,
altough
Correct your spelling
although
 there
many
Add a missing verb
are many
show examples
people
Use synonyms
they
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 dont seek
Use synonyms
work
Fix the infinitive
to work
show examples
hardly
Change the word
hard
show examples
for
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 reason
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
situation
Use synonyms
its
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
 adverse , On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
hands
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
show examples
 a lot of
people
Use synonyms
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
try to
work
Use synonyms
 hardly and get everythings
thier
Use synonyms
 would with
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
money
Use synonyms
 and live in peace . In conclusion , it is evident that the
people
Use synonyms
 who try to get better
work
Use synonyms
 comparison
people
Use synonyms
 who
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
accept
Use synonyms
thier situaion
Correct your spelling
their situation
.
Therefore
Linking Words
 ,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 believe that the
people
Use synonyms
 who
work
Use synonyms
hardly
Change the word
hard
show examples
 to get
Use synonyms
thier
Correct your spelling
their
life
Use synonyms
 wont to be . must ensure steps are taken to prevent
this
Linking Words
phenmenon
Correct your spelling
phenomenon
 deteriorating future .
Submitted by shougaldhafere on

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grammar
Work on improving your grammar and spelling. Consistent errors can distract from your ideas.
structure
Try to structure your essay more clearly. Use paragraphs effectively to separate different points or arguments and ensure a logical flow.
development
Develop each point more thoroughly. Provide specific examples and explanations to make your argument stronger.
introduction
Ensure that your introduction clearly states the topic and your thesis. This helps the reader understand your perspective from the beginning.
attempt
You attempted to discuss both views, which shows that you understand the essay requirements.
structure
Your effort to write an introduction and conclusion is appreciated and shows an understanding of essay structure.
examples
You included examples to support your points, which is good practice in essay writing.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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