In many countries, students leave high school without learning how to manage their money. Why is that the case? What could be done to tackle the issue? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
It has been noted that in many states high
school
learners
graduates
without a single concept Change the verb form
graduate
on
Change preposition
of
money
management
. This
is because the school
curriculum does not include finance
as a unit and also
scholars are young to understand money
complexity. The significant solutions
is to revise and include it in the syllabus Fix the agreement mistake
solution
as well as
involve their parents on
promoting Change preposition
in
saving
culture.
Correct article usage
a saving
Firstly
, as far as money
is concerned, anyone can fail to utilize it properly and end up into
regrets. Change preposition
with
money
is a basic thing since we utilize it in our day-to-day lives. Many schools equip learners
with knowledge on how to make income generating
projects but fail to guide them on how to manage it when it is on the hand because Add a hyphen
income-generating
finance
management
is not among the subjects taught in both lower and in
Change preposition
apply
the
high schools. Correct article usage
apply
Additionally
, the learners
who are completing high school
are of young age with probably no additional role apart from studying and they solely depend on their guardians for financial support therefore
they see no need to learn on
how to manage the resource. Change preposition
apply
For instance
, a study done in the USA by students
at the
Florida University showed that only 15% of scholars had Correct article usage
apply
basic
concept of how to utilize and save Add an article
the basic
a basic
money
.
Nonetheless
, to curb the deficit of money
management
the state should review the curriculum and add finance
management
as a compulsory subject. This
will enable all students
to be equiped
with Correct your spelling
equipped
knowldege
on how to make Correct your spelling
knowledge
money
, utilize it and save for a rainy day. For example
, UK
has introduced an additional Correct article usage
the UK
finance
course for both learners
be it in lower or high school
. This
will result
them being able to spend the little Add the preposition
result in
result from
money
they get wisely and also
the skills will be beneficial in future when they will
secure jobs and start earning as they will have no issues with Verb problem
apply
money
. Further
, interdisciplinary
approach whereby parents are included in teaching the children Add an article
an interdisciplinary
money
matters will be of help as it will be a walk in the park for teachers while
tackling it in the class. This
will also
improve their discipline when it comes to spending any coin they have.
In conclusion, I believe students
lack skills
to manage Correct article usage
the skills
money
since no one talks about it in school
. Therefore
, if added as a unit it will help students
from different backgrounds and they will be able to manage money
wisely.Submitted by janenjeru6 on
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the question effectively, but more specific examples and a deeper exploration of the issues and solutions would enhance your response. Try to provide more detailed and supporting arguments for each point made.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains logical structure with clear introduction and conclusion. However, clearer transitions between ideas and paragraphs would improve the flow. For example, use more linking phrases to guide the reader.
coherence cohesion
You have provided a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in framing your argument well.
task achievement
You have touched on relevant points about the school curriculum and the involvement of parents, which is good.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.
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