Unemployment is one of the biggest problems of contemporary society. What do you think are the main causes of unemployment? What solutions can you suggest?
Unemployment has become one of the biggest problems of modern society. I think the main
causes
of unemployment is the pressure of finding the Fix the agreement mistake
cause
right
job
after studies and fitting in
the work culture.
In general, Change preposition
into
people
experience
a
high pressure to find a Correct article usage
apply
job
after their studies. Due to
inflexible job
specification
, asking for years of Fix the agreement mistake
specifications
experience
for
example, it is difficult for them to get a Add the comma(s)
, for
job
right
after university that matches the
study. They stay unemployed Change the word
their
as a result
, waiting for the right
vacancy.
In addition
, to fit
Change the verb form
fitting
in
a work culture can be hard regarding the match of the Change preposition
into
job
with educational papers. People
who practise their jobs for years are being fired because of the harsh requirements of having a finished degree. They got the job
decades ago because the whole industry was different back in the days
. Fix the agreement mistake
day
This
causes a problematic situation in which an individual with a lot of experience
and knowledge is not able to find a job
because of not having a certificate. Yet, almost every company has open vacancies.
To combat the problem of unemployment, companies should start assessing people
at the job
interview. In this
way, both company
and Correct article usage
the company
individual
know about the expectations and tasks. It is crucial to tackle the obstacles around the achieved degree because it can be a large burden for Correct article usage
the individual
people
to stay motivated after being declined at job
interviews.
To summarise, I think people
are not able to meet the requirements of job
descriptions after their studies and are unemployed as a result
. At the same time, the work culture is changing and valuable professionals become unemployed because they do not have the right
papers. I think changing the way of doing job
interviews and lowering the job
requirements will enable people
to show their knowledge and experience
.Submitted by maria.vanwell on
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task achievement
The essay addresses the task and provides a clear response to the questions, discussing both causes and solutions of unemployment. However, it would benefit from more relevant and specific examples to enhance the arguments.
task achievement
Some ideas are a bit generic. Try to add more specific and detailed points or examples to illustrate your arguments better, particularly in terms of the pressures faced by job seekers.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that all sentences within the paragraph contribute to the development of that idea. This will help improve the logical flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Transition phrases could be used more effectively to make the essay flow more smoothly from one point to the next.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each section addresses a specific part of the task.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay, providing a cohesive end to the piece.
task achievement
The essay offers a broad overview of possible causes and solutions for unemployment, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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