Studies have shown that most criminals have low levels of education. Because of this many believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate prisoners so they can get a job after being released. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is a vivid fact that the majority of criminals are low educated.
Therefore
many people consider that the most effective way to reduce the number of crimes is to educate them in prison. This
can lead them to a better place in the work field after their acquittal from jail, and moreover
why i
agree Change the capitalization
I
on
its benefits.
From the beginning, Change preposition
with
this
movement can change a lot of prisoners' lives in their period in prison, changing their everyday routine from doing nothing except breathing, to enhancing their knowledge, mental abilities and special talents which all can be used in their existence after their term behind the
bars. Correct article usage
apply
Furthermore
, this
process of teaching guilty citizens various studies, has one unique purpose to entertain them to help them get rid of the violence in their instinct or in other words
keep them away from life-threatening behaviors prisoners had in the past. Also
, this
can lower the number of internal fights and angers
in the jail.
Another aspect that claims to have great success in research is the chance of getting a job or getting employed. Change the wording
anger
fits of anger
waves of anger
This
can encourage prisoners to study hard for their new life after their freedom, even if they do not pay attention to these classes, they still can spend several hours of their day obtaining special skills for jobs and work areas which in future they might even make a living out of it. At the end
but not least, men and women can increase their knowledge by reading books even if it is just for
pass Change preposition
to
time
.
In conclusion, the beneficial points of Correct article usage
the time
this
happening are more than enough to make it happen for organizations, and this
could guide our society to a better condition and generally speaking to a better place to live .Submitted by TUTOO on
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task achievement
Your introduction is clear and presents the central idea of the essay. However, it could be more engaging. Consider providing a bit more background or framing the issue with a relevant context.
task achievement
Make sure your main points are directly related back to the prompt. In the body paragraphs, ensure your arguments clearly support why you agree or disagree with the statement.
task achievement
Use specific examples to illustrate your points. This will strengthen your arguments and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs. Ensure there are smooth transitions to improve readability and coherence.
coherence cohesion
Clarify and expand on some ideas to make them more comprehensive. This will help to avoid any ambiguity and make your arguments stronger.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the overall argument.
coherence cohesion
Your reasoning is generally easy to follow, and the structure of the essay is logical.
task achievement
You make a strong case for the benefits of educating prisoners by presenting multiple points to support your view.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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